Archive for August, 2010
Passing as a woman is the Holy Grail for many TG ladies. But it is really a goal worth pursuing?
If you’ve been afraid to show your feminine side for fear of “not passing,” it might be time to rethink your priorities.
I believe everybody has the potential to pass, but let’s face it … it’s not always easy! It can take years to master all the subtleties of walking, talking, and acting like a woman. And depending on your physical makeup, you might even require surgery to be truly passable in all situations.
These are necessary investments for transsexual females on their way to becoming full time. But if you’re a crossdresser with a full time job and a family, then trying to become 100% passable is probably not practical.
Rather than getting hung up on “passing” vs. “not passing” (didn’t we get enough of that in grade school?), I suggest you make it your goal to “blend in” instead. Blending in means that you look girly enough not to stand out in a negative way, even if you aren’t 100% passable.
The key to blending in is to create a harmonious female image. Dress appropriately and act natural. Most people don’t scrutinize everybody around them, so unless there is something glaringly off about you, you are unlikely to attract a second glance.
Does this mean 100% of the population will think you are a genetic woman? Probably not. But it doesn’t matter.
The happiest transgender women I know don’t care whether they pass or not. They care about being themselves.
Passing is great when it happens, but there’s nothing wrong with being seen as the transgendered woman that you are! As long as you choose the right environment and present yourself well, you are likely to be met with acceptance.
Now I’d like to hear from YOU! Do you try to pass when you are out en femme? Or are you proud to be seen as a transgender woman? How important is “passing?” Please leave me your comments below!
Size has a lot to do with perceived femininity. In my last blog post, I talked about how to look shorter. Now let’s move on to big hands and feet!
Even short TG women tend to have bigger hands and feet than genetic women. This sends masculine signals, so here are 5 tips for downplaying large hands and feet:
1. Wear heels
Heels make long feet look shorter because they bend the foot into a vertical position. Obviously you shouldn’t go overboard if you are tall, but even a 1” heel will make your feet look smaller and more feminine.
2. Groom your fingernails
Groomed fingernails make your hands look more feminine, which helps blend them into your overall image. Choose nail shades that blend into your skin tone, rather than attention-grabbing reds and pinks. The ideal fingernail length is 1/4” past your fingertips. Nails that are too short or too long make your fingers look stubby.
3. Avoid strappy sandals
Strappy sandals are sexy, but the more of your foot your expose, the bigger it looks. You should also avoid T-straps since the center strap creates a vertical line that makes your feet look longer. If you want to show skin, choose peep toes or sling backs instead.
4. Choose the right jewelry proportions
Avoid flashy rings and bracelets if you have big hands, but that doesn’t mean you should go for dainty jewelry styles. You need big bold jewelry to match your proportions. If you want to wear bracelets or rings, choose one or two wide but simple styles in a solid color.
5. Go for rounded toes
Remember those pointy toe shoes that looked like they could be used as a weapon to kill somebody? Thank God they are out of style now because they are a TG girl’s worst nightmare! Pointy toes add unwanted length to your feet. Square toes are also a no-no since they make the feet look wider. Instead, go for classic shoe styles with rounded toes.
Ok, ladies – what do you think? Do you have any suggestions to add to this list? Leave me your comments below!
P.S. Alice Kim and I show you how to correct every TG body flaw in The Ultimate En Femme Fashion Guide. Clothes and accessories are your BEST tool for creating a passable feminine image! Click here to learn more.