Should You Give Up Your Goal of Passing as a Woman?
Comments
Passing as a woman is the Holy Grail for many TG ladies. But it is really a goal worth pursuing?
If you’ve been afraid to show your feminine side for fear of “not passing,” it might be time to rethink your priorities.
I believe everybody has the potential to pass, but let’s face it … it’s not always easy! It can take years to master all the subtleties of walking, talking, and acting like a woman. And depending on your physical makeup, you might even require surgery to be truly passable in all situations.
These are necessary investments for transsexual females on their way to becoming full time. But if you’re a crossdresser with a full time job and a family, then trying to become 100% passable is probably not practical.
Rather than getting hung up on “passing” vs. “not passing” (didn’t we get enough of that in grade school?), I suggest you make it your goal to “blend in” instead. Blending in means that you look girly enough not to stand out in a negative way, even if you aren’t 100% passable.
The key to blending in is to create a harmonious female image. Dress appropriately and act natural. Most people don’t scrutinize everybody around them, so unless there is something glaringly off about you, you are unlikely to attract a second glance.
Does this mean 100% of the population will think you are a genetic woman? Probably not. But it doesn’t matter.
The happiest transgender women I know don’t care whether they pass or not. They care about being themselves.
Passing is great when it happens, but there’s nothing wrong with being seen as the transgendered woman that you are! As long as you choose the right environment and present yourself well, you are likely to be met with acceptance.
Now I’d like to hear from YOU! Do you try to pass when you are out en femme? Or are you proud to be seen as a transgender woman? How important is “passing?” Please leave me your comments below!
Love,
Lucille
Related Posts
Loading ...
Today someone almost mistook me for a girl when they glanced at me (and I haven’t even started feminizing myself yet)
i’m very comfortable being transgendered – a woman in a male body! passing takes too much psychic energy, my opinion. blending is really the best way to go for me – physically and mentally and emotionally! people around me are very accepting and encouraging, i don’t think this wouuld be the case if i was trying to pass as a female.
Oh, I like to say I won’t even pass as a transwoman any more. Certainly can’t pass for a male by any means.
I came out as a transsexual last year, age 34. I gave up the thougt of always do my outfit so complete that i would pass as a girl all the time. I dont, but i dont care. I feel beutiful and thats the important thing for me. I tell you, it is not easy to stop careing what other people think, but it is possible. I was terribly nervous the first time i went public with just half the outfit, it was obvious that a was male in other peoples eyes. But i did it anyway.
What i didnt expect was that people around me, at work and my friends, would be so supportive. I thought i would annoy them but that didnt happen. Instead they have encourage me to wear whatever i want. They see me as the bravest person around.
So you all nervous tg:s, it is possible! My picture of how it was going ti be for me coming out was not correct at all. whore heals to the mall last weak, the ultimate test, couldnt care less of what people thought of that, it felt good for me, and does it feel good it will show, as self confidence.
I recommend you to try. One small step at a time, to face the unpleasent feelings it gives. You will grow as a person and one day you will be as confident that you can wear whatever, passning ot not.
This has been such a turmoil in my life I feel that I am going insane. I look back and I’ve always had the desire to be a girl. And I’ve been so ashamed of myself. Guilt and shame have ruled a lot of my life. Now I’m married ” at 46 and am now 51″and my wife is so supportive. She is the most understanding person I have ever met. I am truly blessed. She helps me with my clothes, make up, wig, everything and I am too embarssed to let her see me in them. I dress while she is asleep and take everything off before someone sees me. My son is 19 and very “macho” and proud of it. I’m so afraid if he knew it would crush him. He has me on a proverbial pedestal. And my stepson is 12 adhd bipolar. And VERY impulsive. In a small midwesttown of 2000 people I can’t let it out. Is there anyone out there feel the same? Any advice!?