I’ve observed that many crossdressers and transgender women recognize their gender identity at a young age. For some, it’s an early realization, while for others, it unfolds later in life.
I’m curious about your experience…
When did you first realize you were female or had a feminine side? Was this something you felt as a child, or did it develop over time?
I’d love to hear your story! Feel free share your thoughts in the comments below!
Love,
Lucille
Hi Lucille<
I was about 10 when I started going into my moms makeup cabinet. I loved mascara and lipstick. I eventually started trying on my sisters clothes while wearing the makeup and became good at applying a full face and adding a short curly wig that my mom had in a bag in her dresser drawer. I would use my sisters Seventeen and other girly magazines she had laying around as well as my moms Redbook to teach me how to be feminine. I have always been a very thoughtful, caring, polite and respectful person so most of my best friends were girls in high school. They loved having me around because I could listen to their boyfriend issues and be non judgmental. I remember one night after a party being a little tipsy a couple of girls were in the bathroom applying makeup and i think they saw me watching a little more intently then most boys would have. They coxed me in to letting them do my makeup and then dressing me in girls clothes since i was a lean shaped boy. I dressed a couple of times for funny school high jinks like a Cheerleader lip syncing to "angel is a centerfold" and powder puff football games as the girls team cheerleader. I guess that was the start of being able to dress in public as a female and i loved it! I'm more a cross dresser because i am happy as a single man but, love to every once in a while explore my girly side for a weekend.
Give me a pair of lacy undergarments, women's jeans, a nice shoulder length wig, makeup and some heels and i'm in heaven. 🙂
You have the looks, there is no doubt. Keep your head up and you will meet your desires
Charlie, I very well know the feeling you have described. I now live full time as a woman. I sleep in baby doll nighties and get up and start my day as a woman applying my makeup after showering and one of my favorite parts is putting on my lipstick, it makes me feel so feminine and like a woman. I also wear garter belts and hose everyday and after putting them on I then select my panty, bra, dress and shoes that I’m going to wear that day. I do all things feminine and as a woman would do it. I love being a woman and looked forward to this time when I could do it without having to go back male again. I also did a lip sync back in the 80s on VHS tape. I fixed up my living room to look like a stage from the camera angle with a curtain behind me, got dolled up and did the Doris Day version of ‘I Enjoy Being A Girl’ from the musical, ‘Flower Drum Song’.
And a great body
Oh I forgot, very sexy
You did very well, I am impressed
I was 3 or 4. I knew I liked wearing girl panties and night gowns
I was 4 when I first started to wear my moms underwear. Just love it. Never stopped. I now consider my self as a woman who likes to be a girlie girl all the time. Love to go out as a girl 24-7.
Hi Steph,
I too, now live full time 24/7/365 as a woman and I love it. I have retired from my male job and do not have to worry about being male again. When I could in the past I did live full time as a woman but conditions were not right for me to remain doing so. But now I can do that! I do not have any male clothing left and only have women’s clothes and female attire. I sleep in baby doll nighties every night and start my days as a woman putting on my makeup. I am taking a testosterone blocker (spironolactone), and estrogen and progesterone the 2 main female hormones are the main hormones of my body. I do take supplements to promote my female hormone levels. I also eat foods that promote estrogen levels in the body. As a result I now have natural female breasts growing from my chest. I still have shrunken male genitals down below but other than that I am a woman. Now that I do not have to work anymore I try to do female self hypnosis daily using videos, tapes and CDs, some of which I have purchased from this very site. I have a boyfriend that treats and uses me as a woman in and out of bed. I absolutely love my life.
I new when I was 5 that I was a lady. Was fifteen my than boys and loved to play house n girly things.
I love to go out as a lady n go shopping! Love to wear lacy clothes n camisoles under my clothes…
I wear lipstick and moms bra
My story is kind of a long story but I will try to make it as short a possible but still get the facts told. This is a true account of the start of fem side of my life.
I was an only child from divorced parents. I guess I started as a normal little boy but then there are some events that happened that made dramatic changes in my life that have lasted all the way until today.
It was just my mother and I living together. In the neighborhood we lived in I was the only little boy around my age. There were some older boys that hung out together but I was too small to keep up with them so they didn’t want me hanging around. The only kids in my neighborhood my age were girls. So if I wanted other kids to play with and socialize with I had to play with the girls, and I had to play their way or it was no way at all, so yes I had to play dolls and house with them. I was ridiculed and teased by the older boys for playing dolls with the girls. The boys called me a sissy girl. So maybe that was the very start but then mom worked all day and had to leave me with a babysitter when I was 6 & 7. My babysitter’s name was Ruby and she had a daughter just a little older than me but the daughter Allison, Allie for short, was a total tomboy and from what I remember there was nothing feminine at all about her and she preferred being called Al, a boy’s name. Ruby wanted a feminine daughter and she just was not getting that with her own daughter.
There were some events that happened when I played with Al, she had a playhouse set up for a girl in the backyard and she wanted us to play house. To play with Al was another one of those ‘my way or no way’ situations. So Al’s way was to play house with her as the man and husband and me as the woman and wife. There were some old clothes that Ruby gave to Al hoping that she would use them playing house and become more of a girl instead of a tomboy. So Al had me wear those clothes and also some red lipstick from an old tube. Al always dressed like a boy in blue jeans, T-shirt and sneakers. Al had some dolls that she never played with in the playhouse so Al’s idea was those were our kids and it became that Al was also the father and I was the mom. Ruby bought Al many girly things in hopes that Al would be the feminine little girl she wanted but during my time there I became the benefactor of all those girly things.
There was one day after we had been doing this for awhile that Ruby came out to check on us and watched us as we played house. Ruby stopped us because it was getting close to mom coming to pick me up. She did not say anything about me wearing a dress and the lipstick or the way to big for me high heels. It was the next day that I went there after mom had dropped me off that Ruby talked to me about what was happening. She said she had talked to Al about it and everything was ok. She did tell me though that we could have a lot of fun together if I would let her make me into a girl when I was there. But I could not say anything about it to anyone at all, not even my mom because most people would not understand. We started that very day as she dressed me in Al’s girly clothes that she would not wear. I wore a pair of girl’s panties that belonged to Al and a dress and girl’s shoes. I had that little male bulge so we started working on tucking me and she used some medical adhesive tape to hold my little male part back between my legs so that I would look like a girl under the panties. Other than helping me tuck, Ruby never did touch me nor do anything to me sexually. Being tucked like that I did have to sit on the toilet instead of standing in front of it and had to tinkle like a girl. This was all part of my feminine and girl training. Ruby treated me as if I was a girl and her feminine little daughter. I went along with the training because coming from divorced parents and my mom working all day as a card dealer in a Reno casino, Ruby was giving me the attention that I needed. My mom had to stand on her feet all day behind a blackjack table and was tired at night. I do remember that I started looking forward to being taken to Ruby’s house during the day because she gave me so much attention that I was not getting at home. She took me around town to go shopping and introduced me as her daughter. I remember that she would just put a light coat of makeup on me and fix my hair like a girl with a ribbon in it and I would be wearing a dress and girl’s shoes with panties on underneath. Ruby started buying me girl things like my own panties and other female clothing.
On my birthday when I turned from 6 to 7 my mom took me to a Disney animated movie and to get a cheese burger, fries and a chocolate shake which was my favorite food then and we also had some birthday cake and ice cream when we got back home. She also got me some boy presents; like toy cars and Tonka trucks and some little green plastic army men. But on a different day Ruby had a girl’s birthday party for me with a cake that had pink and white frosting and some girl’s presents. I remember I got some dolls and other girly things. Ruby went a step farther and started making me into a miniature woman for Al and I to play house. She made me dresses that were more the style of a grown woman would wear, and she altered a bra down small enough to where I could wear it and that was back in the day when some less endowed women used the foam rubber falsies that were white, beige or cream colored to enhance their bust line and we put those in my bra cups and for someone my size that gave me a huge rack. She also made or altered down a garter belt for me and made me stockings from little girl’s ballet tights. She would also put full makeup on my face.
My mother found some roommates to move in with so she didn’t have to pay a babysitter. Each of the roommates, who were women that mom worked with each had a teenage daughter so there was always somebody around the house to watch me. Mom never knew what happened to me at Ruby’s house.
I was the only male in a house full of women. It was a 4 bedroom, 1 bath house and each of the 3 women (mom included) had a bedroom for herself. The 2 teenage girls shared a bedroom. The house had a basement and part of it was made into a bedroom for me to sleep in. I frequently saw the other women and girls in various stages of dress and undress and sometimes even nude as they got out of the only shower and bathtub we had. The females did not think anything of it because I was just a little boy. I was fascinated with the women and girls and got used to them walking around the house in panties and bra, sometimes a garter belt. These females did not know it but they were giving me lessons. I watched them applying their makeup and things like that. Being that I was just a little boy they would not always close the bathroom door. I think that I was 8, 9 and 10 but and maybe 11.
When I was 12 my mom felt I was old enough at that age to watch myself during the day and she got a smaller 2 bedroom 1 bath house. She worked 5 days a week but being in a casino she had to work weekends but also worked 3 weekdays with 2 week days off. During school when I only had a few hours before mom get home I would dress sometimes just for a while and the 2 weekend days I had all day but in the summer I still had at least 5 days to myself during the day. It happened that I started remembering Ruby and about being a girl. My desires and fantasies of being a girl got stronger. My mom had Fredericks of Hollywood sales catalogs and I would look at them and want to be one of the sexy models in there. I started prowling through my mom’s clothes and her spare makeup box and a few other things. I found sexy things that I could wear and one was a blond pageboy wig. I started getting fixed up as a girl or young woman around the house during the day in full makeup and dressed underneath in bra, panties and garter belt and hose with a dress over everything else. My hair is dark so I loved being a blond girl around the house wearing clip on earrings; mom had sensitive ear lobes and was allergic to certain medals so she used clip ons instead of pierced. I got so much into being a girl. It felt so natural and so right to me. I started douching and even sneaking her tampons sometimes. I was always changed back to being a boy before mom got home but I really wanted to stay as a girl until she got home and talk to her. I imagined her walking in the house and seeing me like that also with a tampon inserted up my bottom. She would be surprised and wonder what was going on. Then I would say, “Mom, we need to have a talk. I am your daughter and not your son, please help me be your daughter.” She smiles and says, “Yes dear, I will help you be my daughter. We need to select a female name for you.” But that never happened because I chickened out. Mom never did know of my desires to be a woman. This continued on all through my high school years and when I was 18 I moved out on my own into an apartment. I had to work a male job but the rest of time I was at home I was en femme.
Many years later I am now living fulltime and 24/7/65 as a woman. Due to my HRT I have grown breasts. I take a testosterone blocker and promote my estrogen levels and also my progesterone. They are small but do fill out a B cup in a full coverage bra. My push-up and demi bras are a C cup. I have no male clothes at all and only female clothes. I am very happy living as a woman. I have become very feminine and womanly.
It Started about 6 or 7 when I start wearing my older sisters clothes when i can and I like it the feeling of the silky nigth gown or the panties or the pantyhose and any time i had a chance i got some kind of small bag of women underwear and clothes that I steal from my sisters ,,,, when both of them marrie, I got a big stash of clothes that they did not take whit them so I start thinking in going out as femele …but I was a coward and only 1 single time I went to a bar as female and it was great until some bullies make me go home craying and frustrated …so yes I M a woman traped in a man’s body and responsabilities
I used to paint my own fingernails when I was 6 or 7 yrs old. I would sneak my Mom’s nail polish and make them all shiny, when I knew she was using the clear color. Then when I was 13, I noticed I wasn’t as muscular and not developing like some of the other boys. I was smoother skinned, and my legs were out of this world looking, so I started wearing little shorts and skirts…….and I haven’t regretted a moment.