I’ve observed that many crossdressers and transgender women recognize their gender identity at a young age. For some, it’s an early realization, while for others, it unfolds later in life.
I’m curious about your experience…
When did you first realize you were female or had a feminine side? Was this something you felt as a child, or did it develop over time?
I’d love to hear your story! Feel free share your thoughts in the comments below!
Love,
Lucille
I can never remember not feeling girly…even as a young child I liked dressing in Mom’s clothes. I have had many relationships/marriages and kept my CD a secret. I was never “close” enough to any of my partners to share. I have been outside of a relationship for a few years now which has given me the chance to express my feminine side and I have had a great time doing so. I still am “Ted” local, but I am “Dori” when I travel outside my home area. Like some of my fellow girls, most places I travel to are very accepting to Dori and I get only a passing glance. I have something going on with Dori all the time now. I always have beautiful red toe nails and I wear a bra most days, unless I have a tight fitting top which shows off my developing boobs. I hope to be in a AA cup by the end of the year, as my AAA cup is getting full. I plan on having some cosmetic surgery done next year to alter my facial features to allow Dori to be better looking. Some other work may be done, like getting rid of my excess belly fat to give Dori a better shape. However, the more I think about expressing my feminine side as Dori, the better I feel and I am more at peace with me and my surroundings. My current pen pal/girlfriend knows about Dori and is quite acceptable with having Ted and Dori in her life…we shall see.
I remember when I was about 6 or 7 wearing my mom’s nail polish (and getting teased for it) and enjoying having my mom put lipstick on me for when we went out. To be honest, I think she put the cap on the tube and convinced me that I was wearing lipstick, but I was happy anyway. And one of my best days as a kid was when my cousins put a dress on me so the could sneak me into a Sunday girls only brunch. I was a cute little girl. I suppressed my desire to dress in fem attire for years because of societal pressure, I wished I had not been born a guy for years, but I still embraced my masculinity.
I was blessed to marry an understanding woman who actually encourages my desires by buying little surprises for me. I sometimes wish I had been born into the “right” gender, but my life is good the way it is. I’m allowed to be a girl at home and I can turn my masculine side on for the business world and be successful there.
It all happened when I was around the age of 7-8yrs, I wanted to wear girl’s panties instead boy’s underwears,so I tried with my elder sister’s without the knowledge of others in the Home. Later When I was around the age of 11-12yrs, I wanted to cover my breast, so I had observed my elder sister wearing Bras, so I tired to wear them without the knowledge of others in the Home. As I grew up, my urge to wear the female clothes increased, I kept observing females in my locality wearing only Saree, so I tired to wear Saree of my sister or mother, make-up with their make-up articles, wore their jewels or bangles and enjoyed my appearance as a female in front of the mirror when I was all alone in the Home. One day when I was dressing as a female, my sister suddenly caught me, she also helped me to dress/ wearing the saree and from that day she always helped me to dress as a female and sometimes she used to take me to shopping or her friend’s house dressing me as a female, but nobody recognised me till now, neither my parents nor my neighbours. But as on such once when I went to stay with my aunt’s house for my further studies, I could not control my urge to dress as a female, so I started stealing into my aunt’s room when she was dressing/wearing her undergarment or wearing a saree, even my aunt didn’t object to it, she instead took the help to hook her bra or tie her peticoat.This continued for some days, I could not control the urge, one day I asked her even I wanted to dress as her or wear saree, to this she without any hestitation, undressed my clothes and made me wear her clothes-bra, panties, petticoat, blouse & saree. This continued until I stayed with her to complete my 5′ years of my college education. So my journed as a female crossdresser is continued till now.
Now I have my own dresses or make-up sets to be a complete woman
When I was about 14. Somehow I just knew that I was supposed to be a girl. Today, as a biologist I know that it must have been genetic and my brain was wired for a female existance.
I found female clothing attractive and extremely comfortable to wear…it just felt “right” when I was expressing my fem side. My early teen life always had the wish that I would wake up someday as a biological female. At that period in time society frowned on such feelings and I was deeply closeted as I still am.
Today, years after those early uncertain feelings as a teenager, I still know that I was meant to be a woman and my major disappointment is that I will never be able to be pregnant and have children.
To all
MY STORY IS CURIOUS HOWEVER SIMILAR TO MANY. AT 4 YEARS OLD MY MOTHER WOULD PUT ME IN THE TUB AND LET ME HAVE A GREAT TIME. i DISCOVERED HER SILK NIGHT GOWN AND STARED WEARING IT IN THE BATHROOM AND BATHED MUCH LESS. I WANTED TO BE LIKE MY MOM AND SISTER AND FELT LIKE I WAS A GIRL. AS I GOT OLDER I WAS DRESSED AS A BOY AND GREW AS A BOY BUT ALWAYS AT EVERY OPPORTUNITY WORE FEMALE CLOTHING. I GOT SEEN BY MY MOM AND SISTER AND THOUGH NOT REALLY BAD THEY CORRECTED ME AND SAID AS I GOT OLDER I WAS BETTER TO NOT DO THAT. THOUGH I CONTINUED WHEN I WAS HOME AND GOT CAUGHT SEVERAL MORE TIMES BY THE TIME I WAS 8OR TEN WAS TOLD TO STOP AND NOT DO THAT PEOPLE WOULD THINK I WAS A BAD PERSON.BOTH MY PARENTS WORKED AND MY SISTER HAD TO TAKE CARE OF ME. SHE WAS 7 1/2 YEARS OLDER SO THAT WAS ALWAYS A BURDEN FOR HER. HER FRIENDS AND HER STARED PUTTING MAKEUP ON ME I THINK TO EXPERIMENT BUT ALSO TO MAKE PEOPLE THINK I WAS A GIRL SO IT DID NOT LOOK LIKE HER LITTLE BROTHER WAS TAGGING ALONG. WE WERE CLOSE TO COUSINS AS WELL AND WHEN I WAS CLOSER TO MY TEENS TWO OF MY MALE COUSINS I IDOLIZED DECIDED WITH THE ONES GIRL FRIEND WHO WAS A HAIRDRESSER TO DRESS ME AS A GIRL AND USE ME THE SAME WAY. SHE LIKED LESBIANS AND THEY LIKED USING ME FOR THERE FAVORITE PLEASURE AS I GREW OLDER AND REALIZED I WAS A WOMAN BUT DID NOT REALLY LIKE MEN THEY WERE A LITTLE UNPREDICTABLE AND STARTED ACQUIRING CLOTHES HOW EVER I COULD.IN MY TEENS I DEVELOPED VERY SUBSTANCIAL BREASTS WHICH IS NOT UNCOMMON AS MY MOM IS AN HH AND SISTER EE SO IT JUST KINDA WAS NORMAL. I WAS VERY HAPPY AND BRAS FELT NICE SADLY I WAS ONCE AGAIN NOTICED BY MY MOTHER AND SHE FORBID ME FROM DRESSING IN GIRLS CLOTHING AS I WAS A YOUNG MAN AND SHOULD DRESS AS SUCH.SADLY MY BOOBS GOT SMALLER AS THE MALE PART DEVELOPED I HAD MY STASH OF CLOTHES BRAS AND PANTIES.MY LIFE CONTINUED AND I DATED AND AD FUN AS GIRLS WERE MY FAVORITE ANY WAY. I MARRIED IN 73 JUST OUTA HS AND MY WIFE WAS NOT APPRECIATIVE OF MY FEMALE WARDROBE SO I MADE IT DISAPPEAR. ONCE AGAIN FEELING LIKE SOMEONE HAD JUST TAKEN AWAY WHO I WAS. WE HAD 5 KIDS AND MY SECRET LIFE WAS JUST THAT. IN 1999 I HAD AN INCIDENT THAT HELPED ME UNDERSTAND A LOT. I WAS LEAKING FROM MY BREASTS AT A BUSINESS MEETING AND WENT TO THE DOCTOR WHO SENT ME TO A GYNO IF YOU CAN IMAGINE LONG STORY SHORT I HAD HAD A VASECTOMY YEARS BEFORE AND IT TRIGGERED SOMETHING IN MY BODY YEARS LATER AND IT WAS DETERMINED I HAVE AN OVARY AND THAT THE DOCTOR WHEN I WAS BORN DECIDED TO CONCEAL MY PARTIAL VAGINA AND MAKE ME MALE. UNUSUAL FOR THE TIME PERIOD BUT IT IS WHAT IT IS.MY MOM CLAIMS TO HAVE NO KNOWLEDGE OF IT AND ……. THAT IS THAT. i AM MARRIED TO VERY VERY SPECIAL WOMAN NOW AND SHE ENCOURAGES ME TO DRESS AND FEEL THE WAY I WANT AND THOUGH MY JOB LIFE IS STILL MALE I AM WHAT COULD BE CALLED METRO OR GENDER NEUTRAL IN MY DRESSING. i WEAR ONLY FEMALE UNDER CLOTHES AND AS A RESULT OF THE HELP OF LUCILLE AM AM FEMINIZING OK I REALLY WOULD LOVE BIG BOOBS BUT IM 56 AND WE WILL SEE HOW THAT GOES. MY HIPS ARE SLIGHTLY BETTER AND ALL OF MY PANTS ARE WOMAN’S AND MOST OF MY TOPS SO HAVING AT LEAST A LITTLE HIP HELPS THIS IS IT FOR NOW AND IF THIS IS NOT THE FORUM TO SHARE THIS LUCILLE USE IT ELSE WHERE WITH MY BLESSING HAVE BEEN WITH YOU A WHILE AND ENJOY YOUR CORROSPONDENCE.
I knew when I was about 8 years old, but I didn’t understand it until I was about 10, I never forget when I had tried the shoes of my mom on me. The feeling was amazing, strong, a happy feeling, I was with a big adrenaline…and I can’t stopped to buy girls clothes and shoes and put all in a very safe place. I have 56 years old and born in Uruguay, S.Amwerica and I, as a lot of girls suffered a dictatorship situation during 13 years, where if any police or soldier would discover you was a tv or try to be a Gay..then we lived in a very dangerous and terrific situation. A lot of girls was put in jail, tortured and violated.
Nobody would imagine the very high cost we paid to be a woman !.
Now, and with my young and very femenine soul, I’m very happy to live in a free country where the sexual options are respeted. I’m very happy to see as a lot of young wrong born mens can tell to her mothers “Mom…I would like to be a women”.
But I’m Vicky and fight a lot of years…from 10 yeas old to go out of my closet and be very very pride to be a WOMEN !!.
Cheers from Uruguay !
Vicky
(sorry for my bad english)
Like many others here, I would say that I’ve always known. I just didn’t always understand what I knew. My earliest recollections are from around age 5 or 6, when I would want to role-play, pretending to be characters from my favorite TV shows. I always wanted to be one of the girl characters. My parents went along with that for awhile, but gradually I “learned” that just wasn’t the way things were “supposed to be”. So my feminine thoughts and desires became more and more closeted. Instead of the long hair I wanted, I wore the crew cut they wanted. Instead of playing with clothes and makeup and hairstyles, and so on, all that sort of “girly” stuff got pushed farther and farther off into the realm of “fantasy” for a long time. But for me, it never was a “fantasy” — it’s who I am, and I’m very happy to finally understand that now. In my case, it’s taken well over thirty years and the help of a supportive friend or two for me to become brave enough to actually bring out the girl that was always inside. But from the first time I finally got to see her in the flesh, I knew for certain — this feels right. It’s who I’ve been all along. And now I’m delighted to say that I see her there every day — even days when I have to pull the hair back in a simple ponytail, dress boyishly, and forego (most) makeup (despite some supportive people in my life, I’m not able to be “out” to everyone at this point yet) — I still see Taryn looking back at me from that mirror. It’s a wonderful feeling. I wish I hadn’t lost all those years in-between, but I’m not looking back. I’m looking forward. And I owe a great big thanks to wonderful, helpful and supportive friends, both those I know personally, and people like Lucille — your program and tips are great. Every little bit helps. Please keep ’em coming.
Hi, dear sisters!
When I was 7, my Granny & my Aunt braiding my long hair, wear me dress my older sister. They made Beautiful Girl. Thank my Granny & my Aunt!!!
Good for all, Ruslana long braid.