“Passing as a woman” is the Holy Grail for many crossdressers and transgender women.
But is it really a goal worth pursuing?
If you’ve been afraid to show your feminine side for fear of not “passing,” it might be time to rethink your priorities.
I believe everybody has the potential to pass, but let’s face it… it’s not always easy!
It could take years to master all the subtleties of walking, talking, and presenting yourself as a woman. You might even require surgery to be truly passable in all situations.
That means that unless you plan to live as a woman full time, trying to become 100% passable just isn’t practical.
Rather than getting hung up on passing vs. not passing, I suggest you make it your goal to “blend in” instead.
Blending in means you look feminine and harmonious enough not to stand out in a negative way – even if you aren’t 100% passable.
Most people don’t scrutinize everybody around them, so unless there’s something glaringly off about you, you are unlikely to attract a second glance.
Does this mean everybody will think you are a cisgender (genetic) woman? Probably not. But it doesn’t matter.
The happiest crossdressers and transgender women I know don’t care whether they pass or not. They care about being themselves.
Passing is great when it happens, but there’s nothing wrong with being seen as the classy crossdresser or transgender woman that you are!
As long as you choose the right environment and present yourself well, you are likely to be met with acceptance.
Now I’d love to hear from YOU!
Please take my “Passing Poll” and share your thoughts below!
Love,
Lucille
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I’m so afraid of comming out and being alone.
Lucille,
You are totally,totally right in what you say.Everyday I am at one of the local malls and I am seen as female or perhaps a very effeminate gay,(although I don’t do anything to encourage this),but I try to be polite,gracious and confident.
I appear male,simply because I don’t cross-dress,but I have developed a female walk,(quite naturally)and I do attract quite some attention.But it’s not put-on,(I am no actor-in fact I don’t even remember how a man walks now)but despite the staring from others,I don’t return the looks,but just remain totally confident in who I am and who I’m destined to be.
Tabitha
Being fairly tall and broad shouldered I think I pass about 15% of the time but passing is not important to me but being the woman I am meant to be is. I have been full time for over 2 years now, recently got a new job and travel to work by public transport.
Passing as a woman isn’t important to me as I’m more genderqueer and being me kinda makes people stare and ask if i’m male or female so I pass as gender diverse all the time and it feels great
Passing is something i do in my car,i am a jane girl,i always dress girly,i look good,but it’s not worth doing my head in trying to pass,confidence in being who i am is the key to my happyness, i can be out the door in 10 min,have no hangups,and take the good with the bad, mostly good, i counteract any negative comments with humor,girls can dress any way they like,so can i,live life,be yourself and enjoy,you only live once,there are tom boys and there are jane girls and society,needs to accept it, diversity is great is’nt it. Cheers Davina.
Hi.
My pic was taken on the 19 . 5. 10.
If there was a contest for who looks like a women that would cover a lot of different shapes & sizes & ages . & of cause theres a lot more as well.
For me i would not enter or even concider doing that. even tho my body is in line with how a women is & looks well some any way. just not all.
im 63 & live as a woman & have done ,as far as people are concerned & accepted as one ,
i dont see my self as a passable women , yet have been told i have , the woman who said that i figgered she was blind , nope she could see .
For me its not looks no matter what i do. so looks are out.
I accepted my self for who i am, androgynous & as such never had problems accepting who i am.
What i have going for myself is i was honest with every one ,
& because they know my back ground it has been easyer being accepted . being on T V & inteviewed & the papers as well .
I may not pass in the looks yet im accepted as a woman.
So for me thats more important, being in womens groups & joining in as a member,
…noeleena…
Here on my thoughts on this article, I persume by sending me this article that you had received my previous email. I think that whether you pass or not is very important in all situations but although one may or may not be 100% passible they can be 99% or 98% convincing.
I think it is more important to blend in. I go places with my wife and I am in drab and still get the comments of “Hi ladies”.