Are you afraid to step out as a woman for fear of not “passing?”
Instead of fixating on passing, my advice to crossdressers and transgender women has always been to try to “blend in” as a woman instead. (Read more on that topic here.)
But lately, I’ve been wondering… Is blending in REALLY the ultimate goal when presenting as female?
After all, why wear cute outfits, style your hair, or apply makeup if no one notices?
I think it’s a natural feminine desire to want to stand out and make a statement. Does your inner woman share this desire?
This is an interesting topic, and I’d love to hear your thoughts:
- Do you enjoy getting positive attention when presenting yourself as a woman?
- Or do you prefer to blend in and attract as little attention as possible?
Please take my poll and share your thoughts below!
Love,
Lucille
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P.S. If you liked this article, you will love my FREE Male to Female Transformation Mini Course.
I like to excel at whatever I do be among the best so of course I want to appear as feminine as possible.I have been told that as a male I have way more sensitivity than most males.So I want to look and feel very feminine and sexy at a high level and at a leve lthat is classy and stands out.Once again.Lucille you have come up with another blog that has helped society so much.It is extraordinary.Thank-you.
I do not have the confidence so I just try to blend in. I am not only dealing with the same issues as we all do, I have my age working against me. I do not mean to be so negative but when I look in the mirror I see the reality of age as most women do. I feel better dressing as a transgender male wearing unisex clothing to help my desire to be a woman and if a club maybe in a dress. I never feel comfortable with my makeup and cannot afford surgery.
fantastic. it tries get out of fear sister.
Normally. I prefer to blend. But it depends a lot on the ocassion and if there is or not a person that
interest me.
I am not out yet, still deep in my closet with the bolt thrown, lights turned out, and hands firmly over my mouth.
BUT i have dressed in the company of a GF before and i loved it sooooo much. it was quite possibly the most liberating thing i have ever done in my life, not to mention the shopping spree we had that weekend. ;~) She kept complimenting me saying i looked so cute, or sexy or this or that or the other, but i just played them off as her being a good friend weather i looked good or not. deep inside i was soaking up the attention and compliments like no tomorrow, it gave my female side a huge self confidence boost on how i look/pass …
BUT outwardly on the surface i was shy, coy and perhaps even a bit defensive about it. I think that its because ive spent the last 38 years of my life trying to fight my feminine side so much that 99% of the time i play comments off with a joke of some kind and deflect the attention away from me and on to something or someone else. This is something that i will have to address and arrest at some point before i come out of my harry potter hole.
But once i do… heaven help me. i have a strong feeling that i will be someone who dresses to get looks and soak up the attention like california soaks up oregons water! why? because i LOVE being all dressed up and purdy. I LOVE my heels, despite the aftermath in pain(just got a few pairs a few weeks ago). I LOVE my makeup. and most of all i LOVE how i feel when i am all dressed up, i am more confident feeling, more relaxed and comfortable in my own skin, more… me.
I personally think, that as genetic males trying to be females that blending in is something most would prefer, not because they don’t want the looks or cat calls or compliments, but because for as long as any of us can remember TransGender males and females have been persona non-grate! think about how many of us have been murdered for no other reason that we passed too well, or because some guy was upset that he wasn’t told sooner and now he ignorantly feels that he is now gay and cant handle that kind of life so he lashes out at the ‘source of his gayness’. Things are changing, yes, but not fast enough. I dont expect things to change over night but there needs to be noticeable progress at some point.
In the end, weather you want to blend in and wear your she-camo perfectly, or be “the woman in the RED dress” from the matrix, just be yourself. Be proud of the fact that you have the courage to change what you are on the outside to match what you are on the inside, and be happy for yourself, not everybody has that kind of inner strength. that is one of the most important things, IMHO at least.
P.S. Pic is of me in some of the new clothes from my shopping spree with my GF a few weeks back. ^_^
I prefer to blend in. However, I appreciate favorable comments on how I look. I don’t go way out in style, but try to fit in with what I feel is acceptable for my age, size and shape. I’ve gotten wolf whistles and other favorable comments on my appearance.
I concurre with your comment and find it very reasonable. Would like, though a couple of photos of your outfits that have recieved favorable comments.
avant tout; merci beaucoup pour votre aide précieuse.
j’adore ètre sur mes 36 entant que femme; 24/24.
mais j’aime aussi voir ma féminité dans les yeux de mon entourage.
je prends plus de confiance en moi; je prends un place de femme dans la société; c’est un droit. méme si certaines sociétés -comme la mienne – ne l’admettra jamais.
Hi there – not posted a comment before, so here goes!
At 5’14” (sic) before I even put heels on, I don’t have any choice about standing out (and I never go out without heels). It took a lot of time before I had confidence to go out in public, but once I had reached a point where I was happy with my look, I found that was all that mattered. I realise I’m fortunate in being naturally slim, and having looong legs. Although I’m no teenager, I get plenty of figure and leg envy from cis-girls that I meet which is killer!
The most important thing is that when you’re out is not to be self aware. Lose yourself in what you’re doing, who you’re with and just be your natural femme self. The more you don’t think about what other people are thinking the less they will think about you. OK, so they might notice you …. well, to be honest, you should want them to! You haven’t been to all that trouble to look good just to vanish!