Are you afraid to step out as a woman for fear of not “passing?”
Instead of fixating on passing, my advice to crossdressers and transgender women has always been to try to “blend in” as a woman instead. (Read more on that topic here.)
But lately, I’ve been wondering… Is blending in REALLY the ultimate goal when presenting as female?
After all, why wear cute outfits, style your hair, or apply makeup if no one notices?
I think it’s a natural feminine desire to want to stand out and make a statement. Does your inner woman share this desire?
This is an interesting topic, and I’d love to hear your thoughts:
- Do you enjoy getting positive attention when presenting yourself as a woman?
- Or do you prefer to blend in and attract as little attention as possible?
Please take my poll and share your thoughts below!
Love,
Lucille
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P.S. If you liked this article, you will love my FREE Male to Female Transformation Mini Course.
I am what you call in the contemplative stage,meaning I do not live as my true self full-time. When I do present as my true self, I try not to attract “too much” attention, mostly due to the fact that I still lack a lot of self confidence. As I get further along and am presenting as my true self all the time, that may change, but Im not sure. When I do make up my face or wear an awesome maxi dress or wear my cute swimwear to the beach or pool, I do it for me. As adults, we’re supposed to be more concerned with self-satisfaction than with what others think of us, right?
xoxo
Lindsey
I chose “Stand Out” because that is the only choice I have! I am 6’6″ and love to wear heels (I’m taller than everyone else already so what’s another 4-5″) so there is no way I am ever going to blend in. So I do my best to “own it” and be as amazing and confident as I can. But…if I had the choice, I would certainly prefer to be able to blend in…to be the “soccer mom” or the “girl next door.” So I voted with what I have to do to be able to go out and be myself but I would certainly prefer the other. But the bottom line, stop worrying about passing. Be the best you can be and F*** ’em if they don’t like it! I pass as a 6’6″ transgirl 100% of the time!!!! Hugs to all!!!!
This picture of me was taken about a week ago. I am wearing the wig and some red lipstick. I think I look good. Imagine how I’ll look with full makeup.
The other picture is the result of 4 months of flat 2 fem and Sublime Bust for the last week. I’m sure they will shrink as I lose weight. Hopefully with continued herbs, Sublime Bust and plenty of massage, they will stay and get even bigger. My mom had big beautiful breasts. I hope they get passed down to me.
I hope it was OK to send these pics along with a copy of an email I sent to you this last week. Valerie V. said she would forward it to you. She said I should consider sharing my experience with the girls who interact in the comments section of the posts. I had no idea where to post it.
Hello Lucille My Angel,
My new name is Lola Wonce. It sounds like “Wants” when
you say it and Lola gets what Lola wants! I think it will make me more memorable. I purchased your Flat 2 Fem program. I am pleased with the results so far. I’m the proud parent of a pair of bouncy 44C baby gurls.
I do love them so much and I play with them a lot! I’ve never been happier. I can’t describe the feeling I get when they are touched and fondled by someone else. They are soft and sensative. I wish I had them 40 years ago. I’ve had a hard life as a man. I’ve finally decided to live the rest of my life as the woman I was meant to be.
I thought it was too late at the age of 58. I am still going to make the change and never look back. My boobs are a great start. I hope to make this complete change to sexy gurl and make my first public appearence in the next year. I started my transformation at the beginning of this year and I have been smiling ever since.
People have been looking at me funny and saying how much better I look. That’s because I was wearing a frown on my face for the last 40 years. I gotta tell ya, I’ve been reborn. Sure I feel so much better now, but wait until I make my public debut. It won’t matter how I look. The only thing that will matter is how I feel, because when I feel sexy, they will see sexy. My confidence will show in every step I take.
I keep picturing myself strutting down the street in my skirt and high heels. I have even dreamed about it. Every woman should know that feeling. That sexy and feminine feeling. OMG! I have never had that full feeling before and now that I have these feelings, I wanna feel this way every day of the rest of my life.
You have helped me experience those feelings. I don’t know how to thank you. I wanna repay you somehow. I know you take great joy in your work and it’s gurls like me that help give you that joy. You should go on a World Tour and reveal to the world all the beautiful women you helped create.
We women who were trapped in these male bodies. We women who have changed the package to better express who we really are. To talk with people more freely and communicate how we feel more clearly. We don’t want to hide any more. We women have unleashed our inner femininity and exposed the true nature of our bodies.
I have bellowed on long enough. I feel like I just wrote an election speech for a crossdresser running for office. My true feelings and my true thoughts to go with them. So, after all this, I never thanked you. Thank You Lucille for your daily efforts to improve the world by supplying us gurls with the knowledge and support to live on strong.
I voted to blend with society, but that statement needs to be qualified. Many women today dress more like men, wearing torn jeans and taking no pride in their appearance. I will not blend into that population. I have had to dress in a drab manner my entire life and as a women I will not subscribe to that form of dress. I am to old to wear miniskirts, but I do enjoy a knee length skirt and attractive blouse. If that points me out as a transgender woman, so be it.
I am post op and pass well, but I think for me I just want to blend in , but if I am out with friends on a night out I wanna stand out so it’s kinda down to how good I feel on any given day , a bad hair day can make me feel like I wanna blend in more, or some days I wake up looking nice and feel full of confidence and wanna stand out more. But that just me.
I have gone out in public so many times as Vikki it has become second nature to me. That is not to say that I can take my femme image for granted-far from it. Each excursion in the public view carries the same concerns as the previous ones that is: put on the best possible presentation possible. What has subsided is apprehension of discovery. I have read from another t-girl’s post that she finds that if she doesn’t really care if she get’s read, it occurs much less frequently, a theory to which I can attest. Rarely do I notice anyone observing me with the exception of young children. Even teen-age girls[who have a reputation for scrutinizing everyone & everything in their immediate vicinity] seem to pay me little, if any, attention. Possibly this is due in part is the fact that I am only 5’3″ tall and weigh 150 lbs. Even in 4″ heels I am generally shorter than most gg’s and I do wear heels every time I go out. Besides the usual trips to Wal-Mart, grocery stores, restaurants, shopping, etc. I have been on over a dozen tour bus excursions three of which was with the ladies Red Hat Society on riverboat cruises. The whole point is to be and enjoy yourself and not be overly concerned about what other people think-they don’t have to live with you but you do 24/7. Until later, Vikki
Gosh Lucille, I voted ‘blend in’ to your survey, but to me that means being myself. I am a year post-op and just so happy to finally be me. And who is ‘me’? Why she is an American Woman. I like to think that we American Women like to stand out; many of us are tall (5’11”), slender(180ish), comported and competent, nice and fun too! So I like to blend in with the millions of my Sisters as we strive to stand out in these ways and many more!
Sheri
I wish to blend in, as far as being perceived without undue notice, as being a woman. This is in regard to being in society in general; shopping, walking down the street, going to church, and any other activities that bring me into contact with any others “out there”.
I wish to stand out when it comes to looking as nice as possible to people with whom I interact. Not only looking as nice, really, but being as nice as I can. Just like anyone else, it is important to me that I am a positive presence to those I meet or know already.