Are you afraid to step out as a woman for fear of not “passing?”
Instead of fixating on passing, my advice to crossdressers and transgender women has always been to try to “blend in” as a woman instead. (Read more on that topic here.)
But lately, I’ve been wondering… Is blending in REALLY the ultimate goal when presenting as female?
After all, why wear cute outfits, style your hair, or apply makeup if no one notices?
I think it’s a natural feminine desire to want to stand out and make a statement. Does your inner woman share this desire?
This is an interesting topic, and I’d love to hear your thoughts:
- Do you enjoy getting positive attention when presenting yourself as a woman?
- Or do you prefer to blend in and attract as little attention as possible?
Please take my poll and share your thoughts below!
Love,
Lucille
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I was one to blend in, but now I would prefer to stand out somewhat and in a glamorous way. Although I can understand why others would prefer not too, many of us start out closeted and that feeling can linger until you transition. This blog was interesting, thanks Lucille. 🙂
I whole heartedly agree with you Lucille when you say “After all, what’s the point of wearing cute clothes, having a fabulous hairstyle, or doing your makeup if nobody notices?
I believe it’s a natural feminine desire to want to stand out.”
And then you ask, “Do you enjoy attracting positive attention when en femme?”
If I were passable, I would LOVE to stand out and have people notice me. Sadly, I am not very passable. In fact, even as a man I am not attractive – never have been.
All my life I have dreamed of what it must be like to be attractive. For people to look at you and think how gorgeous you are. Like YOU are Lucille.
Once I went out en femme and had the experience of being called “miss” at two different places and I was THRILLED! I felt wonderful because I really hadn’t gone all out to look all that femme. Just a little mascara and some lite tan eye shadow and my long hair in a ponytail.
I definitely don’t make an attractive woman by far but it was awesome to have two different guys call me miss.
I almost felt pretty. Almost.
So, yes. If I could attract POSITIVE attention rather just pass as you specified, I would be ecstatic.
Ironically I intend to do both. I try to blend in to society BUT stand out as non-gender binary so people can see we are part of the world and the world keeps spinning.
Must admit I don’t get out as much as I’d like but then well, I guess most of the human race would say that so there you go. Same as everyone else 😉
I don’t overdress, but I do wear nice clothes. I guess that make me stand out.
I believe 2018 is an amazing time for TG people to be out in public without any concern about “passing”, especially here in LA, or up in the Bay Area, Portland, Seattle, Denver, and other progressive cities. But I still prefer to blend in among the crowds in average, everyday attire, hair style, make-up, and jewelry. Maybe a few people will take a second glance, maybe wonder, maybe not. If they don’t and simply see a mid-50s woman, then GREAT! And if they do a double-take and wonder, it’ll be over in a few seconds and not an issue. Sales ladies in stores, waiters/waitresses at restaurants, front desk at hotels, help-desk librarians, Uber drivers and cabbies, ALL call me “ma’am” and are friendly and polite when I’m out as Cathy.
When ever I go out, I always try to just be one of the girls. I always try to look my best and not go overboard. As far as getting the attention I desire, I usually let my personality take care of that part for me.
I would love to come out of the closet, right Now, as being a transgender woman. What I have tried was great. I love to Cross Dress as a woman, and the clothing and garments of a Woman really feel great on me. I even feel like that I was born into the wrong body. I should have been born as a baby girl. I discover that I was a transgender woman back in the Summer of 1981. I really feel great being a tgirl, especially when another tgirl, transgender woman or a natural born woman can look at me, tell me that I am A Girl or A Woman, then treat me as a Girl or a Woman. I would love this from them. I just love to hear a woman tell me that you are not that, but you are a Woman. Come and set her Girl beside us. We knows a Woman when we see one, and you are one of us. You are a Woman. We can see a woman in you. Come here Girl, and let us treat you as a Woman. They then do things to me, as a Woman, and I do love it, their way. I love being treated as the woman that I wants to be transformed into being.
In theory, I feel that blending in is wisest. In practice, I find myself standing out some, and sometimes a lot. As a full-time woman, I’m what I am, and sometimes that’s a bit outrageous. I hope that I do it with some taste and class, but that’s up to the observer to determine. Anyway, I like to have fun with my appearance, usually with clothing. Usually, I prefer to dress up more than down. As a Red Hatter, it’s legal.