Passing as a woman is the Holy Grail for many TG ladies. But it is really a goal worth pursuing?
If you’ve been afraid to show your feminine side for fear of “not passing,” it might be time to rethink your priorities.
I believe everybody has the potential to pass, but let’s face it … it’s not always easy! It can take years to master all the subtleties of walking, talking, and acting like a woman. And depending on your physical makeup, you might even require surgery to be truly passable in all situations.
These are necessary investments for transsexual females on their way to becoming full time. But if you’re a crossdresser with a full time job and a family, then trying to become 100% passable is probably not practical.
Rather than getting hung up on “passing” vs. “not passing” (didn’t we get enough of that in grade school?), I suggest you make it your goal to “blend in” instead. Blending in means that you look girly enough not to stand out in a negative way, even if you aren’t 100% passable.
The key to blending in is to create a harmonious female image. Dress appropriately and act natural. Most people don’t scrutinize everybody around them, so unless there is something glaringly off about you, you are unlikely to attract a second glance.
Does this mean 100% of the population will think you are a genetic woman? Probably not. But it doesn’t matter.
The happiest transgender women I know don’t care whether they pass or not. They care about being themselves.
Passing is great when it happens, but there’s nothing wrong with being seen as the transgendered woman that you are! As long as you choose the right environment and present yourself well, you are likely to be met with acceptance.
Now I’d like to hear from YOU! Do you try to pass when you are out en femme? Or are you proud to be seen as a transgender woman? How important is “passing?” Please leave me your comments below!
Love,
Lucille
How to Disguise Big Hands and Feet
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Size has a lot to do with perceived femininity. In my last blog post, I talked about how to look shorter. Now let’s move on to big hands and feet!
Even short TG women tend to have bigger hands and feet than genetic women. This sends masculine signals, so here are 5 tips for downplaying large hands and feet:
1. Wear heels
Heels make long feet look shorter because they bend the foot into a vertical position. Obviously you shouldn’t go overboard if you are tall, but even a 1” heel will make your feet look smaller and more feminine.
2. Groom your fingernails
Groomed fingernails make your hands look more feminine, which helps blend them into your overall image. Choose nail shades that blend into your skin tone, rather than attention-grabbing reds and pinks. The ideal fingernail length is 1/4” past your fingertips. Nails that are too short or too long make your fingers look stubby.
3. Avoid strappy sandals
Strappy sandals are sexy, but the more of your foot your expose, the bigger it looks. You should also avoid T-straps since the center strap creates a vertical line that makes your feet look longer. If you want to show skin, choose peep toes or sling backs instead.
4. Choose the right jewelry proportions
Avoid flashy rings and bracelets if you have big hands, but that doesn’t mean you should go for dainty jewelry styles. You need big bold jewelry to match your proportions. If you want to wear bracelets or rings, choose one or two wide but simple styles in a solid color.
5. Go for rounded toes
Remember those pointy toe shoes that looked like they could be used as a weapon to kill somebody? Thank God they are out of style now because they are a TG girl’s worst nightmare! Pointy toes add unwanted length to your feet. Square toes are also a no-no since they make the feet look wider. Instead, go for classic shoe styles with rounded toes.
Ok, ladies – what do you think? Do you have any suggestions to add to this list? Leave me your comments below!
Love,
Lucille
P.S. Alice Kim and I show you how to correct every TG body flaw in The Ultimate En Femme Fashion Guide. Clothes and accessories are your BEST tool for creating a passable feminine image! Click here to learn more.
How to Look Shorter
CommentsA few days ago, somebody asked me this question on my Facebook page:
“Is there a way to actually physically resize and reduce my hands, feet, and height to keep in line with the average female?”
It’s a tough question because SIZE has a lot to do with femininity … but you can’t physically change your height or hand and foot size. (No surgeries for this yet.)
The good news is that you can make yourself APPEAR smaller and more feminine.
I’ll talk about hands and feet next week. For now, here are 5 ways to reduce height and look shorter:
- DO choose full skirts and dresses to draw the eye out. (More width = less height.)
- DON’T wear super tight clothes. (Less width = more height.)
- DO wear a different color top and bottom to visually break up your figure.
- DON’T wear monochromatic outfits since this makes you look even taller.
- DO wear a contrasting belt to interrupt the eye from going straight up and down.
Yes, it’s true you might be taller than the average woman. But don’t forget about the sexy tall women out there who are revered for their long legs and height! These lovely ladies are all 6 feet tall or taller:
Who is YOUR favorite tall celebrity? Take my poll and leave me your comments below!
Love,
Lucille
Loading ...P.S. If you found this helpful, you’ll find even more ways to correct your body flaws in The Ultimate En Femme Fashion Guide. Clothes are possibly your BEST tool for creating a passable feminine image! Click here to learn more.
Your feminine image is about more than the way you look. The real power is in sending subconscious signals that you are a REAL woman.
One of the best ways to do this is by wearing the right perfume. Scent is strongly linked to emotions and has a huge impact on the way people perceive you.
The secret is choosing a perfume that creates the impact you are looking for. Here are the basic perfume categories and what they say about you …
Floral
Floral perfumes are light and flowery. They include scents like lavender, rose, gardenia and geranium.
Florals are great for TG girls since they are the most feminine fragrance. Wear them when you want to appear especially girly or romantic.
Examples of floral perfumes include: Dior J’Adore, Stella by Stella McCartney, Kenzo Flower by Kenzo, Anais Anais, Beautiful by Estée Lauder, Eternity by Calvin Klein, and L‘Air du Temps by Nina Ricci.
Fruity
Fruity perfumes are usually based on citrus scents like lemon or grapefruit, but can also include strawberry, peach, kiwi, etc.
Fruity perfumes are fresh and youthful, so they are great for gals over 40. They are also a good choice for when you want to feel confident and energetic.
Examples of fruity perfumes include: Fresh Sugar, L.A.M.B. by Gwen Stefani, Cartier Eau de Cartier, Nina by Nina Ricci, Sun Flowers by Elizabeth Arden, Beautiful Sheer by Estée Lauder, DKNY by Donna Karan, and Emporio White by Giorgio Armani.
Fresh
Fresh perfumes (also called green scents) are light and airy. They are based on scents of grass, green leaves and the ocean.
Fresh perfumes are energetic and rejuvenating. They are a great choice when you are out “en femme” since they boost your mood and put other people at ease.
Examples of fresh perfumes include: J.Lo Glow by Jennifer Lopez, Covet by Sarah Jessica Parker, Fifth Avenue by Elizabeth Arden, Diorissimo, Dune by Christian Dior, Bond No. 9, and Safari by Ralph Lauren.
Oriental
Oriental perfumes are rich and dramatic and smell of spices, musk, vanilla and heavy flowers.
Oriental perfumes tell the world that you are sexy and sophisticated. Just be sure to choose a light scent since oriental perfumes can lean toward the masculine side.
Examples of oriental perfumes include: Dior Addict, Lancome Attraction, True Star by Hilfiger, Opium by Yves Saint Laurent, Samsara by Guerlain, Lalique Perfume by Lalique, Sun Moon & Stars by Karl Lagerfeld, Jean Paul Gaultier Perfume,
Woody
Woody perfumes are heavy and dramatic and are based on scents like sandalwood, patchouli, and cedar.
Woody perfumes are sensual and exotic, but they are the most masculine of all scents. Most woody perfumes should be avoided by TG girls.
Examples of woody perfumes include: Passion by Elizabeth Taylor, Escada by Escada, Lovely by Sarah Jessica Parker, Cashmere Mist by Donna Karan, Habanita by Molinard, Givenchy Organza.
Keep in mind that some perfumes cross categories. (For example, Lovely by Sarah Jessica Parker is a “floral woody.”) Your main criteria for selecting perfume should be how pretty and feminine it makes you feel!
What is YOUR favorite perfume? I’d love to hear from you, so leave me a comment below!
Love,
Lucille
How to Hide Your Adam’s Apple
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