I’ve observed that many crossdressers and transgender women recognize their gender identity at a young age. For some, it’s an early realization, while for others, it unfolds later in life.
I’m curious about your experience…
When did you first realize you were female or had a feminine side? Was this something you felt as a child, or did it develop over time?
I’d love to hear your story! Feel free share your thoughts in the comments below!
Love,
Lucille
I noticed that I was a girl at age 7 when I was looking at clothes with my mom, while shopping for school clothes. I never said anything to my parents and they still do not know.
When I was a young boy, my Mom would take me shopping for new clothes. All the while she was looking at boy’s clothes for me, my interest was at the other side of the isle, where the girls clothes were. I loved the pretty little girls clothes, and wanted to be wearing little pretty dresses instead. I knew at a very young age, that I had feminine feelings and tendencies. As I grew into my early teenage years, I started to wear female blouses around the house when I was alone. I just loved the feel of satin against my skin. I suppressed those feelings and urges until my mid twenties. One afternoon while alone at the mall, I seen a dress in a store window. I was absolutely compelled to go in and buy it. My heart was pounding! I couldn’t wait to get home to wear it. Having no idea of what size I could wear, well needless to say It didn’t fit all to well. As I type this, I’m sitting here in a very pretty yellow spring dress.
I knew as early as a child. My mother dress me as girl as soon as she could (from what my brother told me) my mother knew all along she was having a girl. She told everyone that I was a girl, I was in panties right after I was out of diapers. I was in dresses basicly Most of my life. Even now I still dress as much as I can . I am going through counseling right now to get my hormones. I am 59 years old and single I am living my life right now as a transvestite once I am transition into a female I life my life as a girl to fulfill my mother dream.
I wanted to say how much I admire you. I am 60 and just starting to discover these feminine feeling coursing through me. Good luck with your transition
My first time I was 5 or 6 years old. I was always upset that at Easter and Christmas my sisters would get new dresses my relatives and neighbors would fuss over – but there I was dressed like a shlub…no one paid attention to the little boy in the corner. Well one day I asked my mom totake me into the bathroom as I wanted to try on one of my sister’s dresses. She asked me “why” – and I said I didnlt knwo but I wanted to just see what it felt like. So went into the bathroom and locked the door. My sister (then 7) was banging at the door wanting to know what was going on. But my mom slipped the dress over me, then asked how I felt. I replied, eh…it’s ok, no big thing. But I was lying. For the first time I felt absolutley and totally comfortable. It was thrilling, I loved the feel, it felt ‘right’. It felt natural. So she took the dress off, me still hiding my true feelings…and I went ot put back on my drab boy clothes. I then went into my room and cried myself to sleep…I wanted so much to just be a girl.
I have suspected that I was a girl since I was 5. The real confirmation came just recently as I was going through therapy. It’s pretty exciting and disappointing at the same time. As a part of my therapy, I discovered a long hidden secret that my parents had kept from everyone except my Aunt. My therapist wondered if I had been born intersexed because of my responses to therapy. I knew my mother would never tell me so I asked her sister. You know sisters are sometimes. Anyway, she told me that I was born both genders but in those days the doctor decided. Boy, did he choose the wrong gender for me (pun intended). It’s disappointing to find out when you’re 50. I missed out on a lot of stuff and, as my therapist said, this would explain my monthly mood swings. I could have done without those. Anyway, meet Abigayle Marie O’Malley (AMmO for short).
The furthest back that I can recall with any true clarity of context is when I learned the actual anatomical difference between males and females, at the age of twelve. I’m basically a nerdy tomboy stuck in a male body. The problem is that I have felt wrong ever since I learned that ‘boy’ and ‘girl’ were more than just words and clothing choices.
Puberty hit, and everything felt wrong. Everything. I was miserable just from how my body was changing, and that was without taking all the assholes and bullies into account. I can’t begin to enumerate the number of times I thought of just taking something sharp and cutting pieces off…
Then I tried dressing at home to ease the pain, and my own mother found out. Off to the (school-mandated for bullying and anger management) shrink that I had only decided to tell the week before… and she ends up telling him about my dressing up in her clothes after berating me about it for two days. I froze and couldn’t respond; I couldn’t force the words out with her in the room, and she wasn’t asked to leave. I was fourteen.
Now I’m only just starting to come out to a new therapist in an entirely different part of the state… at 32, twenty years since I first knew something was wrong with me. Twenty years wasted pretending to be a male. Twenty years denying that I want to be a mother, even if I never get the chance to carry my own child.
I was four the first time I tried on girl’s clothing. Fought against it with no success for the next forty years before accepting myself. If i had been born today i would have transitioned as a child, but that simply wasn’t an option back then. Sigh!
I knew I should have been a girl from the age of 7. My girl cousin and I were playing “dress-up” and she talked me into wearing all her clothes. I put on her camisole with the little bow on the front and it felt very nice. Snug and so soft. Then I put on her little girl brief panties. I got them about half way up my thighs and I had a feeling like I’ve never had before. It was sensational. I knew then I was meant to wear girls things. When I have the opportunity, I still play “dress-up”. Bras, panties, stockings, skirts, blouses and one week a month I wear a thick long maxi pad. Yes, I should have been born a girl.