There’s more to speaking as a woman than just feminizing your voice. The words you use (and how you use them) are equally important!
It doesn’t matter how good you look or how “passable” your female voice might be… If you have masculine speaking habits, you’re going to send mixed messages to people.
Here are the main differences between masculine and feminine communication styles:
- Men tend to be more direct and “task-oriented” in their communication. They use their words for the purpose of achieving results.
- Women tend to be more “circular” and detail-oriented in their communication. They use their words for the purpose of forming relationships.
So, what’s the secret to achieving a distinctly feminine style of speech?
In this blog post on transgender voice tips, I share 3 ways to successfully speak as a woman. Read on to learn more!
1. Feminize Your Vocabulary
Men and women have very different vocabularies, so it’s critical to incorporate feminine words into your speech. Here are some key distinctions:
- Women tend to use more descriptive adjectives. A woman wouldn’t tell you about the “pink dress” she just bought. She’d tell you about the “adorable fuchsia Diane Von Furstenberg wrap dress” she just maxed out her credit card on.
- Men and women often use different words for the same thing. For example, a guy might call the lower abdomen the “gut, whereas a woman would be more likely to call it the “tummy.”
To expand your feminine vocabulary, listen to women in real life, on TV, and in movies. Read women’s magazines. Look and listen for words you don’t use and incorporate a few new words or descriptive phrases into your vocabulary each week.
2. Talk More
Studies show that women speak three times as much as men. While this obviously isn’t a universal truth, it’s something to consider.
Are you one of those people who answers questions with one word? If so, practice expanding on your answers. Include more details and/or how you feel about the situation. (Yes, talk about your feelings, girlfriend!)
Of course, this does NOT mean you should drone on and on about yourself. Women are also typically good listeners, so make sure you listen as much as you speak.
3. Ask More Questions
Finally, since women use their words to form relationships, they tend to ask more questions. Men tend to tell rather than ask. If a man asks a question, it’s to get down to the point.
Practice asking more questions the next time you have a conversation with somebody. Not only is this more feminine, it makes the other person feel validated because you’re showing interest in them.
Want to learn more about the differences between masculine and feminine communication? Check out the video below to dive deeper into this topic.
Let’s discuss…
As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts and if you agree with my observations.
How important is feminine communication to you? Do you struggle with this or have you mastered the art of girl talk?
Please share in the comments below!
Love,
Lucille
P.S. If you liked this article, you will love my FREE Male to Female Transformation Mini Course.
Hi your info was right to the point right on for I tend to say very little during conversations unless it is to a man about man stuff.I am pretty smart because of my back ground and diffrent jobs I have endured 10-22-11 I will soon be 60 y.o. and I still have a problem talking I have found it helps to act a tttle bit more dittsy during conversation and find most men like that .thank you Terri terriannlucher@rocketmail.com
very interesting information, i have see it also the same way, but didnt find out it really. thank you for it. All the best from budapest wilhelmina
I what shopping channels alot. HSN and QVC. Almost all the hosts are women selling something. It has helped me alot. Listening to women talk about clothing and jewelry all day has changed how I think and talk, in a good way.
I have a high pitch in my voice, but I do need more time and practice or training with my voice
I agree Lucille, male and female comunication, and expression is very different, and a huge hurdle for me and other tg women. If I’m not very conscious of the way I talk, and express myself, including body language, movement, I slip into old male ways- unconsiously. Like everything it takes practice, before it becomes second nature, and I have to do so much more consistantly.
Thanks again for all of your info, and support Lucille!
Marian
I don’t want to force myself to “pretend” to be a woman. I want it to come natural whatever it is, that is a “true me”. However, even if my word amount is not big (feel more like an observer than the center of attention), I’m a very good listener and tend to ask a lot of questions. And even if in the role of a guy I’ve gotten used to hide my feelings, lately I’ve started to enjoy talking about my feelings and especially to ask how others feel. That’s like “wow, before I wouldn’t have dared to ask this but as a girl I can and it’s great!” 🙂
About vocabulary, it feels a bit strange sometimes to use very feminine words… it’s like stepping on a thin ice, I almost don’t dare… but I guess it’s slowly becoming more natural.
Hi, Lucille,
‘Appreciated seeing your promo and solicitation for feedback. I had to laugh because when it comes to certain communication, I’ve tended to talk people’s heads off, and I’m now sensitive to this potential.
Thank you for sharing the other points in the 1-3 sequence. Female vocabulary is a challenge, and I would expect someone may come up with a glossary of terms showing both the male expression and the equivalent female expression, side by side, for comparison and adoption.
As for speaking in the pitch and timbre of women, your program with Kathe may be eminently successful, but I lack the $$ for such investment.
As for passing in public as a woman, I don’t have the figure or skeletal proportions, due to the long-term effects of testosterone which enlarged my upper body proportionately, and so if I may only differentiate myself as not being your average dude (since I wear foundation and eye makeup in public), that may be the best I can do (without confusing anyone). [I’ve applied for the VA’s program at their National Center for Transgender Equality for treatments, but have to wait for them to contact me, since applying in July — it is the government, you know, and they’ll take their sweet time, I’m sure, lol].
So that’s my two cents, Lucille. Best wishes, and shalom!
Byna ~
OMG, so I’m sitting on the couch with my beloved, she is in her laptop busy with work she could put off, but is so responsible and always does things that in front of her in the immediate. I ask her if she is working. She said yes. I had just finished doing some house work and wanted to know what she’d like for dinner. “it doesn’t matter.” I asked if she’d like some of the fresh sauteed zucchini from the garden with some homemade spaghetti sauce? “Sure.”
At dinner I did ask how her day went. Of course you by now know what her answer was. The funniest, is that she doesn’t even realize that she is doing it. One our biggest issues when we have them, is that I’m continually asking her to communicate with, she will insist “why, I’m fine, everything is fine.” I love her, I just wish we could form a “relationship” in our communications. She loves me, but wishes I didn’t need as many ways and words to feel loved.
Mrs. Joanie B