Are you afraid to step out as a woman for fear of not “passing?”
Instead of fixating on passing, my advice to crossdressers and transgender women has always been to try to “blend in” as a woman instead. (Read more on that topic here.)
But lately, I’ve been wondering… Is blending in REALLY the ultimate goal when presenting as female?
After all, why wear cute outfits, style your hair, or apply makeup if no one notices?
I think it’s a natural feminine desire to want to stand out and make a statement. Does your inner woman share this desire?
This is an interesting topic, and I’d love to hear your thoughts:
- Do you enjoy getting positive attention when presenting yourself as a woman?
- Or do you prefer to blend in and attract as little attention as possible?
Please take my poll and share your thoughts below!
Love,
Lucille
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Hi, all, how I dress really depends on where I am going. If it’s to a party, then I want to be noticed, so all the glitter, drop earrings false eyelashes et al are the order of the day. But if I’m having a drink with a friend in a “straight” bar or hotel I wear an auburn/brown wig, conservative clothes, low or no heels, just so I pass and don’t get read
Dear Lucille
For reasons of feeling safe I would at present want to blend in so that my many imperfections are no too obvious. Possibly confidence has much to do with it. I think many generic women feel the same. However, I would like nothing better than to stand out as ‘stunner’ and be admired and courted by all aroun me. If only!
Love,
Keith/Kaye
I am a work in progress. I want to blend in, but standing out as an individual person is also important. I definitely don’t want to attract attention except if others think I look stylish of fashionable in an acceptable way. This is all up to personal taste. Some would think I look weird, unusual or strange, but I would not encourage them to notice me as I can gauge when another person stares at me rudely. I just don’t give them a nanoseconds chance. I ignore them because they are just ignorant and dumb. I am working on smiling as that is the way to go girls.Politeness of manner is also important to my feminine self. Love to you all ladies and Lucille. Janie D.
I think there’s a happy medium. I believe in blending in with other women, at the same time standing out as much as they do. That’s my right as a female, and its a privilege Ive had to work for so I am going to. I believe in looking like a natural woman (girl) I live my life full time as a female, I am not a drag queen or a cross dresser. It is not cross dressing for a woman to dress as a woman. I do feel you should dress accordingly to your surroundings and not be gaudy or outlandish, or overly dressed for where you are. From that stand point, be natural and blend in. Natural and stylish.
I blend in and stand out. But i go for standing. Why would someone spend money on clothes and accessories in beautifying oneself if she doesnt want to get noticed. I glamed up yo be stared and appreciated. Be proud of who you are. Believe in yourself and everything else will follow.
I must say i am in awe of all you lovely ladies, unfortunately i live in a small town everyone knows me but does not know me, am happily married have two wonderful children who don’t know about my crossdressing and am in the closet at this stage, being of an older age i don’t know if i could ever pass or blend in if i ventured out wouldn’t like to put that pressure on my wife who is already more than understanding, she said she couldn’t go down the street with me dressed, so must respect her wishes for now, perhaps one day. I long to be accepted and would love to be able to just blend in, i have tattoos on my arms from years ago trying to be more of a man thinking that would change my thinking and stop me dressing but we all know that never changes, i am accepting of my feelings now and don’t want to change and can only hope that i can one day become the woman i know i should have been, i have been on flat to fem, thank you Lucille and have come from nothing to an A cup i feel i could blend in if made up professionally and if i then blended in with other women would be more than happy. Sorry about going on and on
When out I try my best to blend in.
allie
To stand out as a woman is, to me, a privilage and an expansion of my total being. I am proud to be a woman, and always strive to be the most feminine that I can- not as a parody of womanhood, but as the completion of who I am. Without question, for me the 2 sides of the coin are present at the same time. To pass AND to stand out are the same of an equal equation and, I suggest, we must be both to truly be a woman “proud and out.” There are times to be one of womanhood as we pass through our everyday lives living and working as who we truly are, receiving that secret smile that only women give each other as we pass through the asle’s of the supermarket or the boutique. And there are the times when those same women give glances of admiration and aprobation when we stand out in pure feminine form. (You know what I mean ladies…)
Be proud of who you are and who you will yet become. Love your life and let others see that you are a positive role model as a woman that you can possibly be.
Stephanie Anne Stockton
I love what you have to say about this, Stephanie.
I whole heartedly agree, I think both answers are valid.