I’ve observed that many crossdressers and transgender women recognize their gender identity at a young age. For some, it’s an early realization, while for others, it unfolds later in life.
I’m curious about your experience…
When did you first realize you were female or had a feminine side? Was this something you felt as a child, or did it develop over time?
I’d love to hear your story! Feel free share your thoughts in the comments below!
Love,
Lucille
I first had the realization that I was a girl, or at least different, at the age of five. At that age, my first experience of putting on make-up and trying to look as feminine as I could, did not turn out well. I was unfortunately caught in the bathroom by my father with lipstick all over my face and some on the counter as well toilet seat cover; I was only five years old after all. Sadly, from this incident I learned how to bury my feelings deep down inside me. Until finally, the day came that I could no longer suppress such feelings and I began to want to change my body to match how I’ve always felt inside. I struggled for years in my teens and 20’s not knowing where to go or who to even talk too about such things. It was only after I discovered the internet in my late 20’s that I began to discovered and learn that I am not alone in the world, and where I could find hormone treatments and everything. In my late 30’s now living full time I unfortunately still lack the funding it takes to further change my body with surgeries. However, I would say that I am quite happy for the most part and I’m much more confident in seeking full-time employment and such.
I guess I discovered the girly side of me at about age 11. Locked in our family bathroom one morning I pulled my older sister’s schooldress from the hamper and out of curiosity tried it on. The feeling I got from it was exhilaratring, tingly, naughty and shamed all at the same time. I’ve enjoyed women’s clothes ever since. I am a male crossdresser. I dress for the feelings I get from it. If I could pass, I would go out in public. I do not consider myself a girl. But I love all girls and women and have very few male friends. -Kayla
I don’t know if I have ever had a “girly” side. I enjoyed playing with my cousin’s doll house and dressing her dolls. I enjoyed watching my mother apply her makeup and just hanging around her. I was, and still am, emotional. I cry very easily and as I get older, I don’t care. Several years ago, I became curious about men with breasts. I have always been fasacinated by breasts and decided I wanted some of my own. After using a product, I developed some small breasts with always stiff nipples. Then, several years ago, my wife and I were separated by a work situation and I lived alone for about six months. I took the opportunity to buy some bras and panties. I wouldn’t wear them to work but as soon as I got home, I would change into my bra and panties and then put on regular guy clothes over them and go shopping or out to eat or just out and about. Most times, I would just walk around the house in the bra and panties. I remember the first time I wore the panties around the house. I was amazed at how special I felt. I couldn’t stay away from the mirror. After 60 some years, I really felt special. What a feeling. I fear that those days are over though, but I have the memory of that brief time.
My wife knows nothing about that and she is adamant that I don’t try to grow any larger breasts and to toughen up as she says. Many years ago, I was given a test by a psychologist that measured tendencies. In all categories, I measured out as more feminine than male.
If any readers can act on their “girly” tendencies, I encourage them to do so. I know there are a lot of men like me who wish they could do so.
I love this site, you are a big help to me thank you so much ron bary
I have wanted to be a girl for as long as I remember.Iam happiest when I dress as a woman. It all seems so unfair. I tried living only as a man.A stint in the NAVY and being a construction worker,but always wanting to be a woman.I have taken so many herbs and hormones but with little effect.Never knew the right dose or amount to take.and keeping it hidden from my wife,who has been a saint through all this.I think this generation has it better than mine.it seems to be accepted more these days.I hope I won’t be an embrasment to my family when I’m gone and they go through my things.As I get older Icare less and less about what people think.TThank you Lucille for being there for us.
At the age of 7 years, I first knew that I was a girl. I used to have a regular girl schoolfriend around in the holidays, and I was much more interested in the dolls she used to play with (and her dresses), than playing with boy’s Action Man.
I used – increasingly – to ‘borrow’ my mother’s foundation wear (unbeknown to her) and wear them, when I felt noone was around.
Furthermore, I used to very heavily resent the fact that girls were allowed to cry, but it was very much frowned upon, for a boy to do the same.
Since then, I have taken every opportunity to secrete ‘unisex’ clothing upon myseld, to work.
I know that you will be able to help me to take the Quantum Leap to appear as a confident girl the great majority of the time.
8 yrs old for sure. I had a sister 4 yrs olderthan I and by time I turned 10 and beyond I had a complete “wardrobe” constantly added too by my sister. she had a huge closet and I have fond memories that the right side of that closet was mine. She’d dress me all the time and we’d spend all our time as “sisters” To this day, she still mails me clothes!
Hi Lucille
My experience is a little different than most as I come from a large German family and I was way down the totem pole. We had to where hand me downs and the only ones that fit me were my sisters that were two years older.My grandfather had no respect for women and he would make it clear to my mother that boys were better than women. My mother chose to dress me as a girl till I was in kindergarden and I was sent home for not fitting in.I have three sisters and three brothers. The neighborhood had only girls my age so I grew up only knowing girly ways. So when did I know I think I new at a very earily age that I was different as I always perferred girls to boys.Yes I got beatup alot in grade school and the girls always came to help me. My mother hated her father and chose to raise me as much as a girl as she could and many of my mothers friends thought of me as my moms other daughter. She had a make-up studio and thats where I spent my time growing up. My sisters were two three and four years older than me and I think that I was the one to replace the daughter that my Mom missed. Mom would spend more time with me as my sisters grew older and spent less time with her. My father always said I was a mama’s boy and spent little time as he had two older boys and my youngest brother five years younger. By the time my parents divorced I was taking care of an alcoholic mother and two brothers and doing all the cleaning,cooking and sewing and maintaining the house as the head of the house. So yes I new i was Diffent.