I’ve observed that many crossdressers and transgender women recognize their gender identity at a young age. For some, it’s an early realization, while for others, it unfolds later in life.
I’m curious about your experience…
When did you first realize you were female or had a feminine side? Was this something you felt as a child, or did it develop over time?
I’d love to hear your story! Feel free share your thoughts in the comments below!
Love,
Lucille
I have always known I was a female all my life I have had these feelings as early as five years old I am now starting to transition and simply loving it. The hardest part for me was going through puberty I always thought I was going to grow up with breast and a very feminine voice and be able to have children I even created this whole artificial life for myself that was so not me and I finally am able to my myself and simple love it.
Over the past 5 years I’ve truly discovered myself. Looking back I can see early childhood is when my feminine side poked it’s beautiful head out. I always had to be the pink power ranger much to the disappointment of my best friend who wanted to be the green ranger, but since the green and pink dated, he chose the red one. Late elementary and into middle school I’d steal my mother’s bras and wear them to bed with water balloons….had a quite a few wet mornings. I’ve also chosen female characters in any game that allowed me to do so. For many years I pushed it aside and just said it was a cross-dressing thing. Over the last year I’ve truly discovered myself and seen the links over time, note almost 30 I’ve decided to get money together and hoping to start hormones as soon as possible however first jumping through hoops to get there. Being Ava is the happiest I’ve ever been in my life and I hope to start my new life as the woman I was born to be soon….btw I was SO excited when I seen this topic come up! Couldn’t wait to share!
Funny how some of us think it will go away and it never does. You are not alone and you have the looks to pass easily. You will be happy
Hello Billie, hope your day is going well.Joan Rivers put it so well, “can we talk” ?? my email tinkerbay@yahoo.com.,do hope to converse hugs Billie p.s.,yes, there is another Billie,
I new a a very early age I use dress in my sister’s clothes, we shared one bathroom so there clothes were always there. I would put them on and even go out to the dining room and show them off I loved the way they felt, and the way it made me feel. I would not change any of it except maybe have came out of the closet already.
Well, the first time I noticed something was in second or third grade. It wasn’t a particular event or situation but somehow I noticed a difference between myself and the other boys at my school. I guess it was because I wasn’t really fond of playing football or basketball or talking about cars and other “boyish” stuff. Secretly I was a little jealous of the girls around us playing hopscotch and jumping ropes and stuff. That’s just part of it, though. With time there was an ever increasing “emotional distance” between me and other males. I didn’t know what this feeling was or how to describe it so I kept it to myself, although it started to have serious negative effects on me. I started to withdraw myself from others and my self esteem suffered, so I became more shy. During this period I joined upper school, being in fifth grade. Suddenly a lot of my friends were gone and new people were in my class. Needless to say that I wasn’t very successful in making new friends. Up until my graduation five years ago my experience in school wasn’t really a pleasent one. I still haven’t told anyone of my “condition ” because I’m to afraid of the reaction. All I have right now are a few clothes, two pairs of shoes, a wig and some breastforms hidden in my room (kind of as an “emergency kit” for the bad times, reminding me it will get better at some point :)). As of now I’m about to finish college. After that I am going to move away so I will hopefully have the freedom finally openly explore myself and the person I want to be in the future.
I was always fascinated in womens clothes as long as I can remember. My sister and her friends would dress me up. When I was about 13, I became involved with a neighbor on a sexual level. Before the year was over, I was dressing for him in clothes he provided. Eventually I asked him how he knew. He said he could see the fem in me and he knew he could bring it out and open a world for me. Well that he did. I eventually did everything that was expected of me as a man but the woman was always inside. For the past 12 years, I was involved with a man where as he accepted me as both, man and woman. I lost him for he passed away in the fall but I hope I can find someone who will take both, the man and the woman. Who I can be friends with and a lover as a woman. I cannot live full time nor do I wish to transistion at my age. I am happy to take as many moments in time that I can be what I feel on the inside. Maybe someday, I will change my mind but I am too old to change a job and just come out. My therapist has diagnosed me with gender dysphoria, well, whatever. I have made it to this point in life, and I have come to terms with it all, however, if I could never dress again I feel I would be devastated. I am typing this as myslef, Lisa. I am dressed as the woman I feel at this moment and I am content. I wish I had someone to share it with on an emotional and sexual level….someday again….maybe.
Hi Lisa, I’m Joy. I had man do the same thing for me at 14. He treated me as his girlfriend and I was in my own feminine heaven! I would love to chat with you if you’re still interested in making a new friend….? ‘Joy
Hello All,
as for the knowing that I was a girl inside came about when I was 6 or 8 and the two neighbor girls needed a third for their “tea party” they were having with their dolls and I was asked if I could play with them my mom saw no harm in letting me play with these girls but I don’t know if she knew what they had planned for me and I had no clue what girls did for play fun and when told that if I wanted to play I had to wear a dress not knowing any of the reasons why boys do not do this type of thing, normally speaking, I agreed and if I wear a dress a girl always wears lipstick.There I was in a dress with red lipstick smeared on my lips when the two feminizers decided to show me off as their new girlfriend to the other folks they knew around the block when one of them came out with a canera and snapped two pics. of us all together.How sweet and innocent I was in those pics. when we got back the father of one was furious that she had done this ti me and told me to go home that boys were just NOT to do girl things and when I asked why he just said “boys are not supposed to” and that was it for me since then I have been enjoying my feminine side and still looking for somebody to explain to me just why it is that a male is “not supposed to”
look, act, feel, be or see himself in a more feminine role or attire or dressed up in whatever he or she wants as one girlfriend said to me years ago to try and help me to be free of this stigmatism that had me trapped in a self-induced closet she said with a psssion “Why be afraid of wearing it, whether it be girls or boys, it’s only clothing, and she was right. I will always remember her name. Angie;-)
Thanks for having me and thank you Lucille.
Love always,Denise
When I was a little boy i used to sit next to mommy on her vanity bench as she put on her make up and painted her nails. Mommy was very beautiful and glamorous, she would spend hours trying different makeup looks as i sat at her side totally fascinted.She tried all kind of looks ranging from a sophistacated fashionista type, to a very heavy made up whorish style with heavy eye makeup false lashes and always lots and lots of glossy red lipstisck. Guess which I liked most….lol.
Mommy had no qualms about me seeing her naked, she had a beautiful body and would shave her pussy right in front of me.
When she painted her nails she would do mine, she would pencil my brows, rouge my cheeks and put on mascarra and lipstick. I was a rather femmy little boy, she called me her little sissy.Mommy had wanted a little girl and she treated me like I was one, I was a real momma’s boy throgh and through.
She allowed my pretty blond hair to grow to my shoulders, she wuold set my hair in curlers when she did her own. i loved it. Daddy was always complaining that she was turning his son into a sissy, Daddy couldn’t have been more correct.
When the time came for me to start kindergarten daddy insisted she take me to his barber shop for a buzzcut. She begged to let her take me to the beuty salon if I had to have a haircut, a place I loved going to with her, it was a place I felt very comfortable in with the totally feminine ambience. Mommy’s favorite stylist was a very swishy androgynous pretty young man that called himself Polli. Polli had plucked and arched brows, wore mascara, had pierced ears, wore bracelets and alwys wore skin tight jeans hugging his pretty bubble ass.
and cork wedgies. I didn’t know at the time but found out years later that mommy and Polli were lovers.
I loved listening to all the girl talk, some of the racier types got quite explicit discussing thier love life. I loved thumbing through the ladies magaizines like Vogue, Glamour and the movie magazines.
(To be continued)
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i can remember i use to paint my lips and dress in my mom’s clothes fro m the age of 4 to 5, after that i had to push all my inner nature and act like a boy, but i always felt as girl from that age till today.