“Passing as a woman” is the Holy Grail for many crossdressers and transgender women.
But is it really a goal worth pursuing?
If you’ve been afraid to show your feminine side for fear of not “passing,” it might be time to rethink your priorities.
I believe everybody has the potential to pass, but let’s face it… it’s not always easy!
It could take years to master all the subtleties of walking, talking, and presenting yourself as a woman. You might even require surgery to be truly passable in all situations.
That means that unless you plan to live as a woman full time, trying to become 100% passable just isn’t practical.
Rather than getting hung up on passing vs. not passing, I suggest you make it your goal to “blend in” instead.
Blending in means you look feminine and harmonious enough not to stand out in a negative way – even if you aren’t 100% passable.
Most people don’t scrutinize everybody around them, so unless there’s something glaringly off about you, you are unlikely to attract a second glance.
Does this mean everybody will think you are a cisgender (genetic) woman? Probably not. But it doesn’t matter.
The happiest crossdressers and transgender women I know don’t care whether they pass or not. They care about being themselves.
Passing is great when it happens, but there’s nothing wrong with being seen as the classy crossdresser or transgender woman that you are!
As long as you choose the right environment and present yourself well, you are likely to be met with acceptance.
Now I’d love to hear from YOU!
Please take my “Passing Poll” and share your thoughts below!
Love,
Lucille
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as you can see i need hands on training to pass
I look rough around. But i’m convincing enough. I work at a construction site with over 2,000 craftsmen.they may sense me but they all call me ms. lynn,or mam. it’s how you present yourself
Lucille,
I agree with you and Jenyfer to a point.Passing as a female is a very hard thing to do.It takes a lot of time and practice to get the female persona.I think that the most important thing is having the Attitude and being comfortable as a woman in the outside world.Also, you have to dress to your environment (blending in as Jenyfer said ).you cant over dress and stand out and and be the center of attention.some times you have have to tone down the sexiness and wear jeans instead of the skirt and heels . Im just about full time as well and love how i look in jeans so when not working in the skirt/heels im in jeans or shorts.
Hi, Like most of us I used to try to “pass” but now blending and being me is so much more important I like to dress well, but always for the day. shopping is shopping not a fasion show, I live 24/7 as myself. and that is the important thing for me..Hi from Australia….Danielle
Hi Danielle you look great I am also in Australia
i never pass. i’m read every time i go out. but i put a lot of effort into my makeup and i try to dress smartly, which means i wear clothes that look good on someone of my shape. i’ve been going out in public regularly since 2001 and i can count on one hand the number of bad experiences i’ve had. i think that if you do your best to present a an image that is feminine and pleasing to look at people will respond positively–even while they are reading you.
I suppose you could say I pass but it would not matter if I did or not. I simply live my life as me…wether or not I pass is irrelevant for me (altho I would never go with out make up on) With no makeup on I look like what the dog barfed up! JinianVictoria
Hi Jinian
You look great and sexy
mona
Hi all,
Well is it important to pass or not to pass? Well I always try to dress for the event. So I guess I would say that I blend in in the most fem way. I Always do my hair, nails makeup. Men adore me womyn hate me lol,lol. But its all about being yourself comfortable and happy is the most important thing. The rest will follow.
Huggs Lynda
PS, If anyone would like to comment on my pic i would lov to hear from you.
PSS, Thanks Lucille for your great Help to our TG community.
I have only been dressing since May of ’09, and I began going out into society, within two months. I’m sure a lot of people “knew”, but no one said a thing. Because I’m happy.
Since the beginning of my transition, I have lost @55 pounds, and I now live 24/7 while at home, as Amanda. I still work as my genetic self, as I have to. but that will soon change.
Eventually, I will get implants, and possibly some neck surgery, as losing all this weight has left some “extra” skin there.
But I’m still happy.
Your info and blogs have helped immensely.
I thank you with all my heart. My happy heart.
-Amanda-