Do you think it’s important to “pass” as a woman? Many crossdressers and transgender women wrestle with this question.
Is passing really something worth striving for?
I’ve shared my thoughts on this topic in this blog post. (Spoiler: I don’t think it matters!)
But now, I want to hear from you:
Do you care about passing as a woman, or are you proud to embrace your identity as a confident and classy crossdresser or transgender woman?
Take my “Passing Poll” and share your thoughts in the comments!
Love,
Lucille
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I have been legally living as a woman for many years. I don’t like the term “passing” because it gives the impression of trying to fool someone. Most people that I interact with don’t notice even though I do not look all that feminine. My presentation is confident enough and (barely) feminine enough that I’m rarely questioned. At this point in my life I am not concerned with being perceived as female as with being accepted as the woman I am.
Michelle — I agree with you 100%. I’m not ‘passing’ as a woman. I think that’s a term suitable for crossdressers, but not for those of us who are just trying to present our true selves to the rest of the world. It’s not so much that we need to ‘pass’ as it is to be accepted as the women we are.
P.S. This is how I look when I’m out:
It’s important to me to pass. As I transition, I want to look good. I wear women’s clothes but I’m comfortable in jeans and a casual blouse. Unless you’re staring at my package, you won’t know that I’m a guy wearing girls clothes and vise versa. Sometimes, I go out with more feminine clothes and it’s obvious that I’m not a woman. But I might get a look or stare. I just keep doing what I’m doing as if those people don’t exist. My wardrobe is kind of plain but that’s what I like. Even after I finish transitioning, I still plan to wear similar clothing.I realize it’s not going to be as if I’m male one day and female the next. The thing is if someone doesn’t like it, it’s there problem. If they try to make it a problem for me, I always have a little something tucked away somewhere. So, that gives me a little more confidence that I will be safe. Anyway, I would encourage all of you just to be comfortable. It’s like doing something that you really aren’t supposed to, like shoplifting. The secret is to act like you belong there because you do.
So, you don’t mind not to pass.
You are very pretty
I think passing will make feel more girly, and we love feel the most girly as possible. So I say is important but no necessary. Maybe im a begginer but I say my dream one day is pass!!
I’ve always been a woman so that’s all that matters. However, I find that when I am at my most confident, wearing an outfit that is synonymous with the area, wear the right amount of a nice perfume, and I smile with my head up, I seem to be more widely accepted as the woman I am
This is a very interesting topic Lucille. Thank you for asking. My feelings have changed over the years and I have an example of how that happened just yesterday. I have a close friend that owns a boutique and she allows me to “play” and try on clothes. She was going to the alterations store to get some dresses altered and asked if I wanted to come with her enfemme, and be the mannequin and get pinned. Years, even months ago, I would have declined since I was not wearing makeup, but I was feeling comfortable and pretty so I went and enjoyed every second.
I am 6’1” in stockings and do not have a female voice so I do not feel that I would pass anyway, but dressing has become such an enriching experience, I just don’t care.
Hi Lucille its me your friend rock ever scince i was 9 years old ive had a feeling i was more a girl than i was a boy ever scince then i kept it a secret all thesesyears about my little secret about being a male ive always felt more like a girl and not a boy ive never told my family about it i never told my mother father and my brother about it i kept it hiden from them all theses years when i was a kid i would sneak into my mom and dads room when they were at work i would try on my mothers clothes on and one chrismas my mother got me a barbie doll for chistmas and my father asked my mom what in the heck why did she buy me a barbie doll for christmas my mom told him that at one time that i wanted a doll or at least she thought that i look more like a girl than a boy thats why she got for me but they never knew that i was feeling like a girl and ive never told any one about it a few years after i was 25 my mother blured out if i wanted to have a sex change i got scared when she asked that i didnt know
Ever since I was a young boy my hair has been long & my mom would take me grocery shopping etc., & Always women would come up & tell her, “what a beautifull daughter you have”! It really bothered me at first, but when I got older & had girlfriends, every one ive had to this day dresses me up sayin what a pretty girl you make! After so many years of that, I thought,”well, why fight it, just go with it”. I couldn’t believe how exhilerating it was & how hot it made me feel when men hit on me! And ive never even considered myself gay at all! I guess I dont know what to think anymore. It feels like early mid-life crisis or I just dont know which one to be! It hurts inside & I dont have any idea what im gonna do! Passing? Well, guess im lucky, I Think!!
I don’t need to pass I know I am a woman inside as long as I have my nails done my lipstick on and my panties and bra I am just fine