I’ve observed that many crossdressers and transgender women recognize their gender identity at a young age. For some, it’s an early realization, while for others, it unfolds later in life.
I’m curious about your experience…
When did you first realize you were female or had a feminine side? Was this something you felt as a child, or did it develop over time?
I’d love to hear your story! Feel free share your thoughts in the comments below!
Love,
Lucille
I can remember back to around 5 or 6 years old and having thoughts about who I really was! At that time I was a boy but had thoughts of really being a girl, I could not tell anyone for fear that I would be outcasted. I have since that time always had girls clothing hidden away and dressed often when no one was around. I put a great front up and no one had any idea about my joy of femimine ways! It really took off at around 12 or 13 years old. I only had to think of a dress or skirt and “WOW” it happened! I now believe that I should have been a girl from the start however, my job and career never really allowed it. Diana
You are a very beautiful Lady Miss Diana! Your sister, Joy
You are a very lady! ‘Joy
Now that I think back on it, I had a few oddities way back…First memory was I was a witch for Halloween at like 4yr old (but i think that was simply before I knew the difference). The first real time I think I questioned my gender was puberty….i could never “Jack off” with just my hand and my privates (get hard, but never climax), so one day i tried out wearing some of my mothers clothes while i tried…and ever since then, I have had very few times I’ve have ever “climaxed’ like a male. exspecially since getting outta highschool and having my own place, I have had a lot more freedom to try things out now, but in order to masturbate, I have to have my own “breast” and a “clit”. I’m still debating on my gender…
as for my real “first time”, it was middleschool, and one of my friends came over, and i got in my sisters dress-up box.
And I’m still in the closet….keep my feminity out only at home.
I first knew that I wanted to be a girl when I was about thirteen years old, maybe twelve but I can remember laying in my room praying to God that he would change me into a girl like my sister and my cousins.
This feeling has never gone away but I have tried to hide it for years and years, I was so jealous of my sister because she had so many cute clothes and was getting to wear makeup, curl her hair, got to pierce her ears and wear all kinds of cute jewelry.
I remember my mother buying her her first training bra and OH HOW I WISHED IT WAS MINE, I should have been born a girl too.
I grew up with all girls and knew something had to be wrong with me although I tried to act like a boy, the feeling was always there and still is that I am really a girl, just not in the physical sense, yet. Maybe someday I will be and then God will have answered my prayers.
From as early as I can remember I have always wanted to wear female clothing. As a youngster I never thought too much about it, but was programmed from an early age that “that” was not natural for a boy so learned like so many to suppress my true desires and pretend to be a normal boy. The desire has never left, and I am happiest when allowed to dress at home and truly relax. I would not be married right now if my wife had not agreed to support me. It was not until our child was born that she changed her mind and demanded I stop my dressing. I told her I had tried many times and failed so would not try again and be miserable. Now I am in an unloving marriage, something I feel trapped in. Some days I think I can give it up for our marriage, but most days I know if I did I would be miserable. I am too old now to consider SRS, but when given the opportunity I can “pass” in public. Those are my only really enjoyable times now.
Hey there ,
How are you … I totally understand where your coming from and life is so hard at times. Sometimes I get so depressed I have a hard time with keeping up with my fem.. looks but its what makes me feel good when I too am at home and can dress up wear make up paint my nails and just be who i know I really am inside I’m glad I read your post and if u get this would love to be friends my yahoo msgr id is p.newyork24 add me and I can also give ya my cell nun.
At about age 6 I knew I was different than the other boys, I enjoyed playing with the girl and had the same interests. It wasn’t until I was older that I knew I was living in the wrong body. Around age 12 I was actively cross dressing in my Mom’s clothes and of course was caught one day. This was back in the 1950’s and little was know about transgender, I told my mom I was a girl and wanted to live as one. Well no help was forthcoming from my parents and I was forced to live and work as a male.
Recently completed therapy and received my letter for hormones and SRS, unfortunately I can not afford the surgery, but having passed through the barriers I feel I have accomplished my life long dream, currently living full time as the woman I was meant to be…who could ask for more.
Thank you Lucille for all your help,
Love,
Connie
Well when i was little (as young as 4) I more then welcomed the idea of being dressed up as a girl
My favorite play time was in my sister’s clothing! unfortunately it was ended and i kept it in the closet and secretly stole my sister’s clothing.
I knew I was different by age five or six, womanhood seemed right as soon as I considered it, though at the time I had no understanding of why. I am not effeminate, really come across more as a female athlete. Never had much body hair, less than most GGs, and have a trim waistline.
My boobs show, so I have to be careful about taking my top off. In a loose t-shirt, they can still pass for the result of too much time on the pec machine.
My longer relationships with women have always collided with my own feminine feelings. I’m much more comfortable in women’s clothing, speaking honestly about my feelings. Still attracted to women, but determined not to have a relationship that requires me to deny my gender identity. It is simply too stressful for all concerned.
If I had known enough, and had support, years ago, SRS would have been a natural choice. I haven’t given up on the idea, but am moving in stages. Very hard to find a TG friendly female doctor, even here in Vancouver.
The concept between boys and girls was not clear to me until I was about 5 or 6. But before that age I recall I was more comfortable to find girls to be more at home as friends. As soon as I became aware of gender difference, I immediately desired to be a girl. At first I thought it was just a childish thought and would go away with the passage of time. Contrary to my thought this feeling grew as I become older, and that was 50 years ago. Today I live a lonely life and turned away a few girls/women who approached me for fear of hurting them in the end, knowing that my inner feeling would ruin the relationship. I am determined to have the transition but not while I am taking care of my mother knowing that this transition will hurt her dearly.