Did you know that your body language makes up more than half of the impression you make on others?
That’s a big part of your feminine image as a crossdresser or transgender woman!
Body language comes down to four key elements: your posture, gestures, eye contact, and facial expressions.
Unfortunately, it’s easy to develop bad body language habits that can undermine a poised and polished appearance.
In this blog post, I’ll share 27 MTF body language mistakes to avoid when presenting yourself as a woman.
27 MTF Body Language Mistakes to Avoid for a Flawless Feminine Image
- Slouching
- Constantly checking your phone (this is a biggie!)
- Biting your nails
- Rummaging through your purse
- Crossing your arms
- Fidgeting
- Shaking your leg or tapping your fingers
- Not smiling
- Scanning the room while speaking with somebody
- Talking too much with your hands
- Exaggerated nodding
- Examining your teeth or face in public
- Applying makeup in public (other than a quick swipe of lipstick)
- Resting your chin on your hands and elbows
- Sitting with your legs apart
- Clanging your silverware
- Avoiding eye contact
- Eye contact that is too intense
- A weak handshake
- Clenching your fists
- Standing too close to people
- Chewing loudly
- Talking while you eat
- Eating or drinking too fast
- Bending towards your food instead of bringing the food to your mouth
- Leaning forward too much
- Leaning back too much
Phew, that’s quite a list, isn’t it? Some of these might seem obvious, but let’s be real – we’ve all witnessed these behaviors in public!
Are you making any of these mistakes? If so, don’t feel bad. (I’ve had to work on some of these myself!) Instead, resolve to improve them.
For fun, do a “body language study” the next time you’re out in public. Notice the subtle actions that enhance or detract from people’s images.
Can you think of any other habits that should be added to this list?
As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts! Please share in the comments below.
Love,
Lucille
P.S. Ready to discover more tips and tricks to be your most polished, feminine self? If so, you will love my FREE 3-part Male to Female Transformation Mini Course.
Wow. …. guilty of several.
I had a nice first. …and probably last…date with a transman. He took me to a VERY expensive restaurant. I am new at dating. .. an committed a couple on the list.
I think I blew it by: talking too much…. and EATING too much. But the prime rib was amazing!
Whenever I think I’m eating too much in public, I always picture in my mind one of my cousin’s girlfriend. She has a petite figure, a waist to die for, and is extremely elegant, and socially impeccable in all her mannerisms (she would certainly comply with almost all items in Lucille’s list). She’s also ten years my senior.
However she eats at least three times as much as I do. It’s amazing where all that food can go. I’m known in my male mode as the ‘garbage can’ since I do eat a lot; at college and during compulsory military training I tended to eat everything that my colleagues didn’t want to eat. But this woman is simply amazing! I’ve seen her devouring with gusto four courses and three desserts, well washed down with wine, and she would just look dainty and feminine all the way — and not add an extra ounce to her figure! Now that’s a metabolism that anyone would enjoy to have — or rather, become green with envy when watching her! 🙂
To be frank, many of these ideas should apply to well-behaved men as well. Being male is not a good enough reason to have bad manners, nor should a man display poor body language.
For those such as myself who switch from male to female and back, many of these can be practiced when presenting either way, not just when presenting as a woman.
I don’t think I have ever read one of your blogs, Lucille, where I haven’t learned something new. Thank you for the valuable service you provide.
Oh, you make a good point: that’s quite true, some of those things definitely are ‘good manners’ for male and female alike. And others are actually beneficial to one’s health, like standing/sitting straight, not bending forwards or backwards, and so forth.
A crossdressing friend of mine, who only recently started (she had no opportunity before), reports that she walks much straighter than ever before, and that has definitely contributed to a much better posture — even in male mode.
Hi Lucille!
You forgot the loud belch! My friend, who is allegedly female since birth, downs a beer and does a belch that would rival a guy’s! She does practically all the things in the no-no list, and then leans back and cracks her knuckles. I sit up straight, try to act like a lady, and watch her do her antics. She doesn’t shave her legs, and wears shorts.
I get the impression that I’m passing way better than she is. At first, I thought she was getting away with it, but with the looks we get when at a restaurant, now I don’t think so. I don’t know if I should tell her about this, or if she really cares. She criticizes me for being more feminine than she is. The icing on the cake was when the ladies room was full, she just went in the men’s side, and no one said anything, like they think she’s cross dressing.
Maybe I should send this page to her if it would help….
Belching and farting in public, at least in the West, are supposed to be no-nos for both male and female alike 🙂
So Gross, I date a girl in college that belched, good thing she was so smoking hot, but still nasty!
Christina III
Oh dear, I’ve had much difficulty avoiding rummaging through my purse in public. One thing that helps me is to contemplate in advance what I will need to have at hand – such as my wallet – and making sure I know where it is in my purse! Another is to look for a discrete place if rummaging is needed.
Oh yes, I’ve been guilty of that one too. 😉
Picking your nose would be a bad move, I’m guessing
And what about blowing your nose at the table. I HEAR & SEE it all the time when I’m out at a Restaurant. And people are still eating their meals, when someone will blow their nose at the table next to you. That’s so GROSS….!!!!
Picking someone else’s nose would be even worse tho. LOL!
Half of these tips are neither feminine nor masculine traits. They are simply human traits that as you said make you look “…less poised”. As I was reading it I started sitting up straight!
The recommendations don’t get much better than this. Thanks for posting Lucille. You are the best. Love, Carollyn
Wow I need to be way better in these areas.these tips are so helpful.these are things I never really thought about.being a classy feminine woman is so important. Shooting for excellence in the female role and understanding all the subtle things that make for a more true feminine persona is using the advice and expertise and adapt it so it leads to a better,great and selffullfilling feminine experience.myself I want excellence so this is another blog that leads to a more meaningful experience. Thank-you
Thanks Gigi! I’m sure you’re already doing fantastic. I’ve been spending a lot of time observing people (men and women) since writing this post, and it’s amazing what an impact these little details can make. 🙂
Thank-you for the nice comments Lucille. Most women love attention so it is appreciated when one’s comments are recognized. Myself I believe in excellence in what I do in life.not in perfection because that can lead to emotional strain.this web site helps me in so many ways to achieve that excellence.there are so many things that makes me understand the feminine experience in a better way.this also helps me I’m my relating to other women.life is about self actualization and with that ces the relationships and the people we interact with each day.thank-you Lucille and staff for enriching my life and all the other people who have benefitted from the caring,educational,loving etc.that this web site offers.
Thank you so much for these tips in etiquette. I sure fail at some of them. As my inner woman : some of them come natural, but the ones I fail at are so on my physical man side.
But yet, I can relate to these tips for both genders.
You have really helped me be very watchful of my body language.
Teddi