It’s not easy being a crossdresser or transgender woman. When you add envy and comparison to the mix, it can make the journey even tougher.
The truth is, it’s all too common to fall into the comparison trap – whether it’s measuring up to cisgender women or looking at those girls who are further along in their MTF transitions.
Feeling jealous or envious every now and then is perfectly normal. But it doesn’t exactly feel great, does it? Plus, it can hinder your progress towards your own goals.
So, how can you manage these emotions? In this blog post on male to female tips, I’ll share 5 strategies to help you conquer envy and comparison.
1. Recognize That You Don’t See the Whole Picture
It’s easy to feel inadequate when scrolling through seemingly flawless Instagram photos. Social media can be a breeding ground for envy, but remember these two important things:
- Most people present an idealized version of themselves online. Those filtered photos may not accurately reflect their true appearance.
- You have no insight into what’s happening behind the scenes. Even those with seemingly perfect lives have their own issues and insecurities.
Keep this in mind the next time you find yourself scrolling through social media!
2. Let Envy Inspire You
Envy is a sign that someone has something you want for yourself, and that’s not a bad thing. Instead of letting envy make you feel down, use it as a source of inspiration.
Set achievable goals and direct your energy toward reaching them. Taking positive action feels incredible, and it can be a powerful way to turn envy into motivation.
3. Get Out and Live Your Life
If you find yourself spending too much time on social media or passively observing others, it can easily lead to negative thought patterns.
Simply put, you need to spend less time in your own head and more time enjoying your fabulous life!
When you’re busy having fun, making friends, and exploring new activities, there’s less room for obsessive comparison.
4. Surround Yourself with Positivity
Are you surrounded by people who constantly complain about how unfair life is? Or who are always trying to outdo each other like a bunch of teenage girls?
Those thought patterns are contagious, so the best thing you can do is find better people to be around: People who are happy, positive, and grateful.
I realize there are people you can’t cut out completely (like family), but look for positive outlets, such as Meetup groups, support groups, or online communities that uplift your spirits.
5. Appreciate Yourself
Remember this: “Another woman’s beauty is not the absence of your own.” To overcome envy, shift the focus back to what makes you special, unique, and beautiful.
There’s no finite supply of beauty or success in the world, so keep reminding yourself of your strengths and attributes.
Is this advice clichéd? Perhaps, but it works!
How do YOU deal with envy and comparison?
Feeling envious or making comparisons is normal, but the sooner you shift the focus back to your own life and goals, the better.
Because, girlfriend, you are amazing just the way you are!
As always, I’d love to hear your thoughts. Have you ever struggled with comparison or envy? If so, how did you deal with it? Please share in the comments below!
Love,
Lucille
I go out in public now all the time as a woman. I am recently retired, and have the time which I love. I am small and feel I pass very well. I don’t envy other women, although I do check out what their wearing to give me some ideas on how I can improve my fashion look. I went to Costco the other day and when I was ready to purchase my items, the sales lady who took my Costco card asked me if it was my husbands! I forgot they check the name. I told her yes, and she said thank ma’am. Made me feel so good! Just be yourself is my motto!
I regret that I started transiting so late in life and am still in closet with it but I never compare myself with other women. I use to compare myself with other guys and never seemed to fit in tried acted straight got married had kids but still didn’t feel right. I soul searched started taking the path to being my real self and I’ve been enjoying life and love being who I am becoming more and more!
i do not have envy i have regret. because when i could easily pass as a woman. when i was younger,and had a girlfreind that pushed me to become even more feminine i stopped her. she started me on a path that still can not get off. but if i would done it the way she wanted it. i would be living as a woman instead of man in womans cloths. so i only have regret.
I envy cis women because they can be themselves all the time, and I don’t have their freedom..
I really compare me with my neighbour taller girls with beautiful up knots & pony tails
Yes, I have looked at other women wishing to have their soft skin or their busty figure, I found that my greatest adversary has been me, until recently I loved to dress but my desire has slipped away. My support system is now gone and my drive has died. the thoughts of giving up has crossed my mind repeatedly.
I am becoming more lady like thank you
I don’t ever compare myself to others. It isn’t fair to you or them. I am who I am. People can love me as such or just keep on walking their choice.