“Passing as a woman” is the Holy Grail for many crossdressers and transgender women.
But is it really a goal worth pursuing?
If you’ve been afraid to show your feminine side for fear of not “passing,” it might be time to rethink your priorities.
I believe everybody has the potential to pass, but let’s face it… it’s not always easy!
It could take years to master all the subtleties of walking, talking, and presenting yourself as a woman. You might even require surgery to be truly passable in all situations.
That means that unless you plan to live as a woman full time, trying to become 100% passable just isn’t practical.
Rather than getting hung up on passing vs. not passing, I suggest you make it your goal to “blend in” instead.
Blending in means you look feminine and harmonious enough not to stand out in a negative way – even if you aren’t 100% passable.
Most people don’t scrutinize everybody around them, so unless there’s something glaringly off about you, you are unlikely to attract a second glance.
Does this mean everybody will think you are a cisgender (genetic) woman? Probably not. But it doesn’t matter.
The happiest crossdressers and transgender women I know don’t care whether they pass or not. They care about being themselves.
Passing is great when it happens, but there’s nothing wrong with being seen as the classy crossdresser or transgender woman that you are!
As long as you choose the right environment and present yourself well, you are likely to be met with acceptance.
Now I’d love to hear from YOU!
Please take my “Passing Poll” and share your thoughts below!
Love,
Lucille
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I think I pass in most situations. My voice, close, body etc. are all very girly. But I think there will always be things you cannot change. But if you feel confident with a smile on your face that will be a big help to.
Best regards
Henriette Kristensen
I’ve been living full time as a woman for 10 years. At first I worked so hard to pass…. then as I saw my friends acceptance of me I started to relax, and really come out of my shell.
I’m so comfortable in my own skin now, I never even think about it, I’m just that crazy old lady who’s really fun to be around…..
I live full time as a woman and men will open doors for me…I look like someone’s mom…lol. I also tend to dress nicer than many ciswomen around me as I refuse to leave the house in sweats and only wear ragged clothes when I am doing scut work, like helping my sister do yard work. Otherwise I always have at least base makeup, earrings, necklace and, at this time of year, tulip skirts, kneehigh gladiator sandles and a gauzy cool top.
Do what’s right for you. I enjoy doing the best I can to present as a woman. Generally, I don’t get a second look and receive some compliments. My feeling is that you can only do your best, but some girls go out without trying very much and it shows. Many ciswoman do the same and it also shows.
I find it much easier when going out to be with other women when women are treating you like another friend no one seems to pay much attention while they are looking at all of us at once any flaws I may have is mixed into all of us and barly noticed . When going solo its real hard cause when they see me I can be nervouse or just try to hard and not look natural. I try to concentrate on what I’m doing like picking things up at the store etc. and not what others might see or perceive me to be.
“Most people don’t scrutinize everybody around them (…)”
This is 100 % not true. In contrary, you don´t have to try pass to find out that most of the people stick their noses in other people´s business all the time.
Crossdressig since I was about 14 years old, live In New Zealand. I want nothing more than to be accepted ad the person I wish I was, society is cruel generally. I have a supportive partner who encourages me to be ME but my own fear stops me. Oh to be ME in public what a dream come true.
Thanks for reading people and remember you are you are don’t be like me, be your self.
You put a very interesting question, Lucille. I have found that with the right clothes, the right posture and the right caution, I have managed to pass reasonably well. It could be just a perception, but one needs to understand the issue between being a heterosexual transvestite and a transsexual. In both cases I think one should make an effort to pass as a woman. After all we are all women where the grey matter is concerned. I have a few women friends who insist I look better than them when changed (they keep referring to my legs), but then I have other women friends who are so beautiful I just go and hide away to avoid showing my envy. I find nothing more satisfactory than being a woman among women. They treat you like one of them, they help you with tips, they lend you clothes, make-up, handbags, and shoes and they confide in you as you do in them. In another age, I would have loved to belong to a harem…..