“Passing as a woman” is the Holy Grail for many crossdressers and transgender women.
But is it really a goal worth pursuing?
If you’ve been afraid to show your feminine side for fear of not “passing,” it might be time to rethink your priorities.
I believe everybody has the potential to pass, but let’s face it… it’s not always easy!
It could take years to master all the subtleties of walking, talking, and presenting yourself as a woman. You might even require surgery to be truly passable in all situations.
That means that unless you plan to live as a woman full time, trying to become 100% passable just isn’t practical.
Rather than getting hung up on passing vs. not passing, I suggest you make it your goal to “blend in” instead.
Blending in means you look feminine and harmonious enough not to stand out in a negative way – even if you aren’t 100% passable.
Most people don’t scrutinize everybody around them, so unless there’s something glaringly off about you, you are unlikely to attract a second glance.
Does this mean everybody will think you are a cisgender (genetic) woman? Probably not. But it doesn’t matter.
The happiest crossdressers and transgender women I know don’t care whether they pass or not. They care about being themselves.
Passing is great when it happens, but there’s nothing wrong with being seen as the classy crossdresser or transgender woman that you are!
As long as you choose the right environment and present yourself well, you are likely to be met with acceptance.
Now I’d love to hear from YOU!
Please take my “Passing Poll” and share your thoughts below!
Love,
Lucille
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I’m always my self at one time I thought I had to hide real me I have felt so liberated since about 6 years ago when I figured out that what I was told and learned but not what I felt or wanted
To me it’s important, but I also think it’s easy to obsess about it & that can drag you down I guess.
I do know that the past 4 years have been my happiest, so pass or not, it’s worth it 🙂
I do have quite a masculine body so it would take a lot of effort for me to full pass. Luckily I live somewhere where even if I’m just casually passing it doesn’t draw much attention.
Another area I use is drag, which I have enjoyed as a great way of self-expression, where the goal isn’t to pass, but put on the best show you can.
I feel the same too. But i dont let it bother me.
hi to all I do care that I am passable as a woman ,but on the other hand I will become a woman . I have transformed a lot in the past 2 years and the more I present my self as a woman the more confident I have be come when I present my self I don’t overdress but I do look smart but casual . The other day when I was driving I was pulled over by the police [I tell you my heart was pounding ]I presented my self as aconfident woman to him and he took mybreath test for alcohol and then said have a nice day and then we left . This made my day as there was no indication from him that I was transgender at all and boosted my confidence to the max. I have seen my local dr and she has given more support than I expected ,hopfully it wont be long before I can take fht and mylife can evolve.
regards Cassandra
I’m full-time, but not hugely passable, for various reasons. But the miracle happens more often than I should expect, unless a whole lot of people are way more than ordinarily polite. It’s enough to keep me trying. Which is a good thing, because if you don’t try, there is danger of getting really sloppy in your presentation, and beginning to come across as one of those pathetic examples we’ve all seen. I’m not being snobbish about that, and I try to help when I can. Just do the best with what you’ve got, and try to be as happy as you can.
I’ve pass as a woman for two decades. Now that I wrote a novel about a transgender woman (a lot about me) “Identity” By Jane B Lee, now I have to promote being transgender. Last week I was in DC for Transgender Lobbying. We met with Congresswoman and Senators, to promote the “Equality bill”. It took quit a lot of thought to NOT pass, it was difficult. Good luck to all of you trying…you can be successful.
Best night i had was when i wore this dress to a hotel jazz club on the top floor with my partner both dressed in killer heals and gorgeous dresses and as we exited the lift a guys voice said ‘wow ladies’ i felt like a million dollars
I pass, but I say this not really knowing for sure what people actually think. I am tall, 6’4″ . I constantly examine my every tiny gesture and item of presentation. To me it is like art. I do this joyfully. I practice bellydancing because it teaches me feminine attitude, which feels so delicious to me. I surround myself with my women friends and I love flirting. I am trying to communicate to the world how I would like to be regarded or beheld, so I always dress in pretty clothes, with makeup, jewelry, perfume, and hairstyle. I am very happy with myself and I suspect people see that in me. They also love seeing me as a woman. I still have much that I want to do but I also have the rest of my life to play.