Do you ever find yourself wondering if it’s okay to crossdress? Do you feel weighed down by society’s judgment and expectations?
Well, it’s time to shed that weight and liberate yourself! Let’s talk about why crossdressing is absolutely okay, and why you should embrace it without any guilt.
1. Self-Expression Matters
As humans, expressing ourselves is a basic core need.
Crossdressing is just one way to showcase your personality, tastes, and preferences through clothing. It’s an ideal outlet for creativity and individuality.
2. Fashion Has No Gender
Who says certain clothes are meant only for specific genders?
Clothes don’t have an inherent gender; they are pieces of fabric that can be enjoyed by anyone. So, wear what makes you feel confident and fabulous!
3. Breaking Free from Gender Norms
Crossdressing challenges outdated gender norms. It’s time to break free from rigid ideas of what’s “appropriate” to wear.
Crossdressing allows you to take a stand against society’s expectations and encourages others to do the same.
4. It’s Not Harmful
Let’s be clear – crossdressing is harmless. As long as you’re not hurting anyone, there’s no reason to feel bad about it.
Feeling guilty about expressing yourself through clothing is unnecessary and unproductive.
In conclusion
Being true to yourself is a beautiful thing, and it sets an example for others to do the same.
So, let go of the guilt, and embrace your fabulous, feminine side!
Now I’d love to hear your thoughts on this topic. Do you ever feel guilty about crossdressing? If you’ve overcome feelings of guilt, how did you do so?
Please take my poll and leave me your comments below!
Love,
Lucille
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I also have long wrestled with “my desires” vs “society’s expectations” having been born male. If someone was born with a cleft palate, or a hole in their heart they can get “corrective surgery”, how is Gender Reassignment Surgery that drastically different? The first 2, and many other similar conditions can threaten people’s physical health, Gender Reassignment Surgery can greatly improve the individual’s mental health. Is mental health irrelevant? Than why do Psychiatrists get paid so much money for 15-minute appointments? Why do companies make so much money off things like Prozac, Ritalin, etc.? Exactly. Mental health DOES MATTER. If a man’s testicles did not descend properly there would be surgery to correct that. And if genetic women can get breast augmentation, etc. and people of both genders can get all manner of other elective plastic surgeries, why can’t people who want it and can pay for it get Gender Reassignment Surgery? It is either a choice, and we as adults have the right to make that choice or it is a mental health issue and we have the right to maximize our mental health. If people were being kidnapped or whatever and forced into GRS, THAT would be absurd, and criminal, but if it is the informed, consensual choice of an adult, it is NO ONE ELSE’S business. There are safeguards in place (psych evaluation, etc.) to make sure that the candidate is suitable for the complex process that is GRS. Why doesn’t anyone ask why someone chooses to dye their hair? That isn’t the color nature intended their hair to be… Such arguments are absurd… If God makes us a certain way and expects us to remain in that exact form, why even create us? Are we not supposed to grow and develop? There is a saying that is pertinent here: It is a poor teacher indeed who is not surpassed by their student, and an unworthy student who does not surpass their teacher. If we aren’t supposed to modify the bodies God gave us, then, don’t gain or lose weight, no piercings, no tattoos, no haircuts, ever, don’t go bald, no hair dye, no cosmetics, no smoking, no eating (since the nutrients and chemicals modify our bodies at the molecular level), no getting hurt, no thinking, since thinking creates new neural connections, and our bodies are sacrosanct and cannot be modified, no surgeries, transplants, skin grafts, blood transfusions, in fact we should all just be put into stasis immediately so as to stop offending God. Of course, this is just the logical (?) limit of this argument to illustrate how absurd it is. If someone else wants to make an informed choice, then it is none of my or anyone’s business. If my sister loves a guy and wants to marry him, even if I think he is a douchebag, I have no say in the matter, if I think the woman she wants to marry is a vacuuous ninny, I have no say in her orientation or her choices, she is an adult, a hypothetical one as I am an only child, but part of being an adult is the right to make ones own choices, along with the responsibility to accept the consequences of those choices. If I want to become a woman, I am an adult and that is my choice. It is no less legitimate than a man choosing to reamin a man. Some people are “lucky” and born into wealth & privilege, others are not, but through hard work, are able to attain to those things. Some are born with good health, and a good metabolism, others need diligent exercise. Those things are not seen as aberrant, seeking after wealth, privilege, or health, some are born the gender they feel comfortable/right as; others, not so much. What is the difference between chasing one’s preferred job and one’s preferred gender? Few are born into the career they will have their entire lives, yet no one questions the child of a couple of doctors who chooses to become a musician, that is called “chasing one’s dream” It is the choice of an adult. This is the same, the reasons thrown out are a smokescreen, the above Iggy Pop quote on this page hinted at the real objection of society to the recent phenomenon of GRS, “manning up” connotes becoming tough or tougher, and generally most idiomatic expressions that use masculine terms connote strength, courage, etc. Idiomatic expressions using the feminine are generally more derisive or pejorative or insulting. Also, the ruling oligarchy does not tolerate deviation from the norms well; or at all, really.
Like u, and so many posters on this site, I too struggle with the conflict of femme desires versus the consequences they would have if ‘coming out’.
Of course,you are right – changing sex is a preference just like wanting to change job or home… albeit that rather more steps and anxieties are involved.
But it is the reactions of others that are the problem and cause of fear. Change your job and the worst reaction u r likely to get is ‘gee, that’s a big risk with the economy in poor shape’, change your home and most people will show some joy for u.
But tell people you either cross dress or want to transition and I fear most reactions would be extreme:
* your mum is likely to burst into tears, like mine did the one time she caught me in her underwear, and I had to lie and pretend it wasn’t what she thought
* family are likely to reject u.
* work life would likely be a torture, being the butt of never-ending unpleasantness, and if u then want to change job it will be very hard to get another as a girl.
* your neighbours probably won’t want to know u.
Maybe I have it all wrong, but I live in UK and consider CD/TG acceptance is even lower than in USA. Some girls posting here have been so lucky and found support and love and acceptance, and happily live full-time-femme, but sadly there are too many sad admissions of abuse and loss of everything.
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if the world was an open, caring, accepting place… but does anyone really think peoples attitudes will change much in our lifetimes? I doubt it…
I have struggled with guilt associated with cross dressing all my life, from my earliest childhood memories of putting on my Mom red lipstick when I was 5 years old and being strongly reprimanded about how wrong it was, to being raised in a fundamentalist Christian home, to now through years of therapy and two marriages.
I have gotten past the guilt from my religious upbringing, as I have rejected my faith in God along the way. Religion never offered any help in this regard, only more guilt and shame, and certainly no insight into why I want to cross dress, just condemnation.
Therapy helped me the most, by learning to love and accept myself for the whole person that I was, not just the socially accepted part of my masculine gender role
My marriages have been a mix of happiness and sadness, even though both my partners knew of my cross dressing before we married. The dynamic between a wife and her cross dressing husband can be difficult for most women, and my relationships have proven to be no different. The guilt I feel is that I sometimes know that when I cross dress that my wife feels emotionally detached for awhile, and although I know I am not responsible for her feelings, I still don’t like making her feel bad or making our relationship less comfortable.
Ultimately, I know who I am, what I need, and that society will likely never accept cross dressing as a mainstream alternative lifestyle. I would love it if cross dressing men had the same freedoms to express femininity as a woman who can easily wear anything they want in public. It turns out to be one of the few double standards that women enjoy the benefit from over men.
I am a cross dresser. I cannot change that fact, nor do I want to try. I would like it more if there could be more social acceptance and less angst over how I prefer to express my gender roles.
Lucille
I am a 61 year old man who has been married to a wonderful woman for 32 years. We have 2 grown children (a boy and a girl) who have recently moved back home My wife is the love of my life and has been wonderful for me. She has been very supportive and has helped me greatly. I do not wish to do anything that would hurt her. I have had feeling for crossing and wanting to be a woman for as long as I can remember. I did not know what to do with them as a youngster but as I got older and was I college I began to experiment. I can still remember the thrill of first dressing up. When I met my wife I focus on her and raising a family. The feeling still existed but I buried them. Lately the feelings have come roaring back. It is as if a feminine switch has been turned on in my body. they are too strong to ignore. I have been doing little things to try and control them I wear woman’s underwear to work I have begun a skin care program I have found wonderful sites on the internet with Lucille’s being my favorite. I am at the point where I feel I must share this with my wife, but I do not know how to bring up the subject I do not want to hurt her and make her feel that she is not all the woman that I need I am open to any help that Lucille and her girls can give Peace and harmony to all of you
I’m not sure it’s “guilt” anymore, after dealing with it for almost 5 decades, but frustration. I’ve known I was different since I was 6 years old.
I tried desperately to make my TS go away, it only got me hurt, and almost killed a couple times. My main problem had been my inabilty to accept myself, or I would have Transitioned 30 years ago. I have tried to Transition twice since then, both times were personally devastating, being disowned, etc, so I’m over the “guilt”.
One thing that has helped me shed the guilt, has been reading every scientific study I can find. I have come to the conclusion that this is a prenatal condition that can no more be gotten rid of than most other birth attributes. If I had known these things 30 years ago, I would be fully Transitioned today.
Maybe there is hope for future generations being accepted, and helped instead of rejected, and forced to live in institutionalized shame.
During my early years – from 8 on, i struggled under the burden of the Catholic church and its so called “moral” decrees. Masturbation was a mortal sin! Dirty thoughts were mortal sins too! What chance did a youngster have to experience “normal” sexual growth? But, i had deeper levels of need, i wanted to be a baby, and i eventually realized i wanted to be not just a baby but a baby girl. Is there a level of sin worse than “mortal”? So, the early years of my awakening were guilt driven and very difficult.
Then the net happened! There are lots of adult baby girls out there, and there are even more boys that love to present as girls! Free, Free, Free At Last!
I do feel guilty at times mainly for religious reasons however i have been crossdressing for over 30 years. in my teen years i did feel guilty and bad about my ways at times and often crossdressed when my parents werent around. i tried to stop a couple of times but as most cd will agree the feelings always return.to this day no ones knows except my GF. coming out to my parents and sister would be a disaster to say the least. Today part of me wishes to be femme full time and i wish i could.i feel a strong desire and need to be marcy more often and if i was younger i would do HRT. I dress on occasion but not as often as i would like due to my surroundings even though my GF knows and accepts its. In the last year or so my feminine desires have intensified even wanting to grow breasts. I am 44 now and have accepted myself although i often wonder why/how I feel this way?
To my regret i have not gone out dressed out of fear of others around me, although going out en femme is a big desire of mine, to experience the world from a feminine perspective. i continue to work and develop my womanly ways in secret in the hopes that one day hopefully soon i will be able to go someplace where i can be about as Marcy and explore the world as her.
i feel i still have ways to go but in time maybe it will happen.
Hi Nicole,
thank you so much for your great advice and I love you for that. I looks like in your beautiful photo you have great cleavage. Have you taken anything to grow breasts or are you using breast forms?
I take it you have gone out as Nicole. How was your experience? if you would like you can email me directly at marcy@fashionfanforever.com.
thanks so much again for your great and trusted advice. Have a gorgeous day.
Marcy
Marcy, in the world of CD things can go from good to bad to worse and everywhere in between. I have a strong Christian promise for you, and it is that Jesus knows you and would not want you to be unhappy. I tried to hide by being in the military and getting tattoos to prove to myself that I am a man, but then I would find myself in a women’s changing room trying on skirts….
My point is that my wife accepts me and is the only one who knows, and that just makes our bond that much more, hold onto that and I cant wait until the day when you let Marcy outside. The feeling is such a rush, if there is a single piece of advice I can give you, it’s be confident, roll your shoulders back, lift up your head and look people in the eye so they know that Marcy is all about being a women when she needs to be. I’m here for you sister if you ever need me.
xo Nicole
hi
One time i used to feel i was in the wrong but soon realized why make others happy with what they see, when i was deciding which way to run the knife. up or across. You are what and how you see yourself, i’ve spent the best part of 30yrs fighting with it all. At last as of 6th of aug every thing will be as it should have been. if it wasn’t for a very good friend i don’t think i would be here today. sorry if sounds a bit heavy. Very happy now feel i’ve reached where i should have been from the beginning.
Alison xx
I started dressing at 13 using my sisters or mom’s things. I was so scared that I’d either get caught or worse, getting the crap beat out of me by dad who is so homophobic that he thinks men with beards are effeminate. Being raised in the south, in the Bible belt, it was not something to parade around in girl’s dresses, especially in the 1970’s. Sis eventually caught me but she was cool with it. I felt more guilt than I have in my life. It was my sister that eventually pulled me out of this quagmire and I love her dearly and deeply.
I felt so bad that I joined the army right out of high school. Infantry, airborne, ranger school put all those feminine ideas to the far back of my mind. Now that I’m 47, married, kids, police officer and getting ready to retire, all those feelings are coming back to the point that my sister and I go clothes shopping for me. The problems that I’m encountering now is very snobbish and not very TG friendly stores and salespeople. That alone is bringing back those guilt feelings. But I’ve served my country for over 28 yrs so I can say F-CK THEM. sis feels the same way. Now my problem is my wife and family. Any words of wisdom concerning this would be greatly appreciated.