Are you afraid to step out as a woman for fear of not “passing?”
Instead of fixating on passing, my advice to crossdressers and transgender women has always been to try to “blend in” as a woman instead. (Read more on that topic here.)
But lately, I’ve been wondering… Is blending in REALLY the ultimate goal when presenting as female?
After all, why wear cute outfits, style your hair, or apply makeup if no one notices?
I think it’s a natural feminine desire to want to stand out and make a statement. Does your inner woman share this desire?
This is an interesting topic, and I’d love to hear your thoughts:
- Do you enjoy getting positive attention when presenting yourself as a woman?
- Or do you prefer to blend in and attract as little attention as possible?
Please take my poll and share your thoughts below!
Love,
Lucille
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I have always preferred to blend in. That way no one would be suspicious of me and no one would look twice (but they did on occasion). Blending in meant acceptance to me. Even then I get plenty of attention because I look and act every other woman.
After many years of training myself and fine tuning my wardrobe I never get a second look now.
I knew then it was time to plunge into my full time role of being the woman I always was and stop acting/dressing like a man.
I transitioned over as year ago and recently completed surgery.
Lucille, you have been an inspiration to me for years! Thank you for all your tips and pointers. You are a valuable asset and all of us thank you.
When I’m approached by someone getting started I send them to your web site.
I have the looks I do everything to look beautiful, I have shoots taken of me,but coming out I would have to have friends who do the same as I do.
Perhaps if I were under 40 I would want to stand out more, but as an older woman, I’m usually happy to blend in and be treated as the woman I know myself to be. Blending in allows for increased safety as well. That said, I am also a trans advocate, so standing out as a trans woman at times and places of my own choosing helps the cause by enabling cis-people to get know a real trans person who is proud of who she is.
I totally agree with you Carrie, blending is a better choice for women like us.
It took me a while to realize that most looks that I got were because I was a good looking “woman”, once I realized that I was experiencing what attractive ladies went through, I learned how to play the game. Playing the game is fun.
Some realize I am TG though, and I guess I am ok with it ,as long as the people don’t become rude or violent.
Holly
I try to blend in but at six one I tend to stand out. So now just being the tall girl 24/7 that blending in is also my way of stand out.
I have worked my whole life to stand out so why stop? There are so many different looks out there that I think you should be yourself and feel happy. I like to combine a bit of froth with a steampunk attitude. I stand up straight, walk with confidence, and smile. I have found that I either get quizzical looks or smiles in return. After a life time of pretending to be male, I can finally be who I want and I show it with pride. Laverne Cox struts, and I feel like I can too. Wealthy or no, famous or no, we can all be stand outs (and knock outs) if we choose to be so.
Dear All,
I am sure I stand out. I am not flamboyant, but I waited a half century to dress as a woman fulltime. Now, I am not willing to dress in ployester pants, an oversize top, and beat up sneakers. I do not dress to the nine’s to go to the market. I do generally wear skirts with tights in cooler weather. I am frequently the only woman in a skirt and reasonably dressy shoes. If I stand out because I prefer to dress feminely, so be it.
Cheers
Caitie-Anne
I love going to shop for clothes at women’s only stores, I enjoy the clerks help with seizing and the looks other women give me while I am being the woman I want to be Lucille you have helped me so much thank you