Are you afraid to step out as a woman for fear of not “passing?”
Instead of fixating on passing, my advice to crossdressers and transgender women has always been to try to “blend in” as a woman instead. (Read more on that topic here.)
But lately, I’ve been wondering… Is blending in REALLY the ultimate goal when presenting as female?
After all, why wear cute outfits, style your hair, or apply makeup if no one notices?
I think it’s a natural feminine desire to want to stand out and make a statement. Does your inner woman share this desire?
This is an interesting topic, and I’d love to hear your thoughts:
- Do you enjoy getting positive attention when presenting yourself as a woman?
- Or do you prefer to blend in and attract as little attention as possible?
Please take my poll and share your thoughts below!
Love,
Lucille
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I agree with Lexy…it really depends. Most of the time I don’t worry that much about blending in, because on any given day I just get it into my head of how I want to dress, and that usually means something much cuter and more attention-getting than the drab blue jeans or leggings that most women wear. There are occasions when I will consciously try to go a bit more conservative. So I guess that sometimes I like to blend in, but most of the time I try to psyche myself into believing I do, even while wearing that mini-skirt or dress or cute shorts instead of jean shorts with cuffs.
My first reply appears to have been deleted. Whatever, I’ve had time to think a little and here’s my rethought answer: Depending on how I feel at the time, blending in/passing or standing out can both have their advantages. I think, though, that what’s the most important to me is to be able to be myself, dress the way I’m feeling at the time (sometimes I like to really dress to the nines and other times a little more casually), and be recognized and respected for the woman I am by the people with whom I come into contact with as I go about my daily affairs. When I finally got up the courage to come out and start living as the woman I am, passing or standing out turned out to be not nearly as important as just being able to be me. I’m also not very tall (5′ 6″) so unless I’m wearing really high platform heels I just look like a “sort of tall” woman.
I’m 64 years old and will never look like I did when I was a teenager, but I can put myself together pretty well and not look too bad for an “old” girl. One of my friends said I look like “someone’s cool aunt.” I’ll take that.
I want to blend in so I can comfortably flow through all aspects of being out. This does not mean I don’t dress with style, but I am aware of where I am and dress in rapport with the environment that I will be in. That is the external presentation. My interaction skills and voice are still a work in progress.
My wife likes my breast but wants me to still have s beard and dress as male. Out of necessity I do wear a bra. I enjoy having breast along with my wife enjoying them.
With all due respect, and you do deserve MUCH respect, I cannot take your poll this time.
You see, the answer really is “it depends.”
To be out and about in general public, I would like to blend in. We take a chance of being humiliated, discriminated against, and sometimes physically challenged by people who don’t understand, fear, and resent us.
However, in a completely safe gathering of understanding and compassionate people, because of my extroverted tendencies, I would definitely want to stand out.
Circumstances dictate an awful lot for me and many others. We have to be concious of them. Thus – I can’t really answer your question. Sorry.
Thankfully, I am blessed with many of my mom’s features especially with medium stature and build. I frequently get addressed as miss even in boy mode. I try to dress appropriately for the location/situation and don’t worry how I am perceived by others. In fact most often I tend to forget what mode I am presenting and just be my own self.
Hi Lucille. This last year many things have been changed for me and specially my Feminine side. I talk almost to every one about me being transgender. It feels so good and every one thinks and says to me that it’s so great for me. I’m an average woman, I blend in on a way that a natural woman is doing too. People apriciate it. I’m not a drag queen and I don’t want to be one. Most of the time when I’m in private I’m a woman. My neigbours and many people in my village know and I get so many compliments. When I go out shopping people tread me as a woman. That is so nice. I don’t like te overdo thinks, I just like to mix with the other woman and it feels so good, so natural.
Dear Lucille, thanks a lot for all the good things you do.
Joke.
I’ve been having alot of fun going out and I don’t try to be a stand out, but I do get my share of compliments from both male and female. The people I’ve been meeting and had good conversation with them are very smart and intelligent and GAY. They know how to have good clean fun besides good conversation and be happy.