Embracing your true feminine self is about more than just your clothes, hair, and makeup…
From feeling confident in your womanly presentation to perfecting your voice and movements, there’s a LOT to consider on this journey.
That’s why I’m excited to share some crossdressing / transgender tips that go beyond the surface.
In this blog post, I’ll share 10 essential dos and don’ts to help make your male to female transformation or transition a little smoother. Let’s dive in!
1. DON’T Compare Yourself to Others
There’s no winning the comparison game. Comparing yourself to cisgender women or other trans women is a misery-inducing habit.
This isn’t a competition. Instead, focus on being your own best female self.
2. DO Find Female Role Models
While you shouldn’t compare yourself to other transgender or cisgender women, it IS a good idea to observe and learn from them.
When you see somebody who looks especially good, observe the details. How does she dress, speak, move, and behave?
While you shouldn’t be a copycat, it can be helpful to incorporate some of these details into your own image.
3. DO Invest in Great Shapewear
The shape of your body broadcasts your gender, so it’s a great idea to invest in quality shapewear. This is even more important than splurging on expensive clothes!
Depending on your body goals, you may want to purchase the following:
- Breast forms in an ideal shape/size for your body
- Waist cincher or corset
- Padded panties (with butt and hip padding)
- Control top pantyhose
4. DON’T Forget Your Voice
There’s nothing quite as jarring as a beautifully made up woman with a voice that doesn’t match.
While a perfect voice isn’t necessary, working on a congruent voice will have a big impact on your image.
Check out EvaF online voice feminization training for guidance.
5. DO Dress Age Appropriately
Dressing appropriately for your age is wise, but that doesn’t mean you have to look boring or frumpy above a certain age.
Choose clothing and accessories that make you look your best without appearing too young or too mature.
To learn more, see my blog post on How to Dress Sexy at Any Age: 3 Crossdressing / MTF Fashion Tips.
6. DON’T Overdo It
The biggest mistake you can make is overdoing it. This applies to all women!
Wearing too much makeup, dressing too sexily, and over-exaggerating your body movements are mistakes that can attract the wrong kind of attention. Instead, think subtle and stylish.
7. DO Get a Second Opinion
Seeing ourselves objectively can be tough. That’s why having a trusted friend for a second opinion is important.
If you don’t have a friend nearby, consider checking out transgender or crossdressing forums, or Facebook groups. They’re great places to ask questions and receive helpful feedback.
And guess what? Our blog has an amazing, supportive community too! Feel free to share your photos or questions below – the lovely ladies here would be happy to provide feedback.
8. DO Seek Support
Whether you crossdress in private or live as a woman full time, you deserve to be supported.
This could mean a lot of different things – from coming out to a partner, joining a support or peer group, finding a therapist, or just connecting with others online.
Being supported makes the journey a lot less lonely – and way more fun!
9. DO Practice Your Moves
Your body language and movements communicate more about you than almost anything else. Pay attention to your movements by keeping them fluid and feminine.
Check out these articles for more tips:
- 7 Tips for Feminizing Your Body Movements
- Trans / Crossdresser Heels: How to Walk in High Heels (7 Dos and Don’ts)
10. DON’T Forget To Have Fun
Whether you’re at home or in public, being a woman is supposed to be fun!
Drop the guilt, the comparisons, and the need for perfection and enjoy being the fabulous woman that you are!
What are YOUR top dos and don’ts?
Now that you’ve seen my list, what are YOUR top dos and don’ts? Please share in the comments below!
Love,
Lucille
P.S. If you liked this article, you will love my FREE Male to Female Transformation Mini Course.
transformation tips?
I really like suggestion #1, which I will reword this way: Be your own woman. Like any other woman, I have my assets and limitations. So, I rock what I’ve got and don’t obsess over what I don’t.
I am a female person who was assigned male at birth. I will never be a natal woman, and didn’t have a girlhood. Neither am I really a natal male, and my upbringing was pretty gender neutral. But I am most authentically, comfortably and joyfully expressed as a woman (albeit one who posses the minor superpower of transsexuality!!).
So, I will be my own version of a woman because I am a unique person, and I am still learning how my innate femininity combined with my history and biology translates into being the best human I can be, a woman who happens to be transgender. 🙂
I love how you put this Brettany!
Thank You!! 🙂
Right now my wife is my only girlfriend and sounding board, so I am always afraid she is a little bias.
Hello Lucille,
If you don’t mind I’m going to be a little bitchy. I really do appreciate your efforts towards us, wannabewomanguys, or wannalooklikeguys. But, what you are suggesting is all about being becoming what you are not, if I followed your rules, and I would get away with it, then I would NOT be the person I want to be. I would be fooling people and me. I am me, and I want to stay that way. Obviously a guy in a dress, but I’m more respected for being what I am, then for trying to be what I’m not.
Stick to the person you are. And to hell with those who won’t accept you, but don’t become the person you can’t be. Be proud, glorious and foremost YOU!
This is me, I’m very proud, but I’m not going to change my voice, or have my jawline operated, or, or, this is ME. Love me or love me.
Given those two choices, I choose to Love You!.
You look fab just the way you are and I am sure you are fun to hang out with.
Keep being you.
You have very sexy legs!!!
Chantelle:
GIRL, YOU GOT NO REASONS TO APOLOGIZE to aNY one for anything. ..you look Fabulous! But, you already knew that if you own a full length mirror!
Enjoy being You! T.J
P.S….at 71 I don’t have too many more years to dress, so I enjoy every moment
This is a continuation from #3. DO invest in good accessories such as wigs. No cheap wigs. No cheap shoes. Inexpensive, yes. cheap NO.
I agree with all of the advice I have received from you thus far. Certainly you have pointed out some things I may have otherwise overlooked. I am new to this but have given my endeavor a great deal of consideration. One very important thing seemingly overlooked by the community I find alarming.
I have invested alot of time exercising and resculpting my physique. For many reasons : foremost is the future surgery but also it helps feminize my posture and movements if I have developed the muscles required. While there is no difference in the muscles we have, there is a significant difference in the way we use them. I have not started hrt but i have in the past year (through diet and exercise) changed from 180lbs 37-32-33 to 155lbs 34-27-35.
For the timid..i used only bodyweight exercises and yoga.
I also eat 4-5 meals a day.
That will certainly be lower when i do the hrt. What mtf women should understand is they can develop faster while they have the androgen production, in terms of muscle mass. Which ofcourse reduces body fat leaving the newborn woman substantially ahead.
I hope I havent bored you but if this helps anyone at all, it is time well invested.
*hugs*
Deeners
Nadine K, this is more of a question than a comment, but the changes you mentioned are quite an achievement. Would you mind telling me how tall you are, and how often you exercise and how long per session ? I’m 5’11” and have dropped from 183lbs to 165lbs in a year only through dieting, albeit not severely. However, my dimensions don’t seem to have changed so drastically as yours. Of course, I haven’t exercised — not laziness, but no time and no precise knowledge of what to do. Also, how do you assess the benefits of eating 4-5 meals vs eating 2 or 3 (as I do, on account of work) ? Thanks. Claudia
Hi,
While those are great tips, I may have a problem with n°8.
While it is possible to choose when you are the occasional crossdresser, it is not always possible for a full-time trans.
Just wanted to point it out.
I’m fine with the rest.
Yuna
Yuna, some places are not safe not matter how you are dressed. I just avoid those places as a matter of course.
Hi Yuna,
I agree with you about no.8, when you are full time trans it is not always possible or practical. However, it is wise to avoid places that could/would be dangerous.
I agree it is wise to avoid possible dangerous places.
But it is a statement valid for everybody.
A phrasing I can use is : “Be prepared. You may not always find yourself in the safest place possible.”
For some that would mean behind the curtains all their life. It starts with building confidence, ask a friend to come with you, introduce yourself in a shop male first, and make an appointment to come female. Take a workshop concerning make-up, and foremost ask your female neighbour for approval.
I was chicken too, but, nobody else can set you free, you have to do that. and you alone.
That’s a good point Yuna! How do you deal with this? Has your environment ever been an issue for you (safety or otherwise)?
I have not yet encountered dangerous situation (safetywise). However I have encountered people with low acceptance.
For some, a quick talk can lead them to at least reconsider their beliefs. For others, well… if they won’t change no matter what, they’re not worth my time.
So, be prepared (but not paranoid)
When choosing a wig, do get one that’s appropriate for your age. Long hair is lovely on a young girl, but more mature ladies (generally) pass better with shorter hair – no more than shoulder length.
38yo 5’7″ 150ish…Is this a good start? My first attempt at daily wear.