So many things go into being a woman… makeup and clothing are just the beginning!
To help you be your best feminine self, here are my top 10 dos and don’ts for your male to female transformation.
1. DON’T Compare Yourself to Others
There’s no winning the comparison game. Comparing yourself to cisgender women or other trans women is a misery-inducing habit.
This isn’t a competition. Instead, focus on being the best version of YOU.
2. DO Find Female Role Models
While you shouldn’t compare yourself to other women, it IS a good idea to observe and learn from them.
When you see somebody who looks especially good, observe the details. How does she dress, speak, move, and behave? You don’t need to be a copycat, but incorporate some of these details into your own image.
3. DO Invest in Great Shaping Wear
The shape of your body broadcasts your gender, so one of the most important items to invest in is great shapewear. This is even more essential than spending money on expensive clothing!
Depending on your natural shape, you may want to invest in the following:
- Breast forms in an ideal shape/size for your body
- Waist cincher
- Padded panties (with butt and hip padding)
- Control top pantyhose
4. DON’T Forget Your Voice
There’s nothing quite as jarring as a beautifully made up woman with a voice that doesn’t match.
While it’s not essential to have the most perfectly pitched voice, putting some effort into a congruent voice will have a big impact on your image. I recommend EvaF online voice feminization training.
5. DO Dress Age Appropriately
Dressing appropriately for your age is a style must for every woman.
This is NOT to suggest that you have to look boring or frumpy above a certain age. You simply need to choose pieces that reflect the best version of you without looking too young or too old. See my 3 Rules for Dressing Sexy at Any Age for more on this topic.
6. DON’T Overdo It
The biggest mistake you can make is overdoing it. This applies to all women!
Wearing too much makeup, dressing too sexily, and over-exaggerating your movements are all no-nos. These big mistakes attract the wrong kind of attention. Instead, think subtle and stylish.
7. DO Get a Second Opinion
It’s hard to see ourselves objectively. That’s why everybody needs a trusted friend for a second opinion. If you don’t have a girlfriend you trust nearby, find a forum or even post your images in the comments section here for an objective opinion on your image.
8. DO Seek Support
Whether you crossdress in private or live as a woman full time, you deserve to be supported. This could mean a lot of different things – from coming out to a partner, joining a support or peer group, finding a therapist, or just connecting with others online. Either way, being supported make the journey a lot less lonely – and way more fun!
9. DO Practice Your Moves
Your body language and movements communicate more about you than almost anything else. Pay attention to your movements by keeping them fluid and feminine. Check out these articles for more tips:
- 7 Tips for Feminizing Your Body Movements
- How to Walk in Heels: 7 Dos and Don’ts for Crossdressers and Transgender Women
10. DON’T Forget To Have Fun
Whether you’re at home or in public, being a woman is supposed to be fun! Drop the guilt, the comparisons, and the need for perfection and enjoy being the woman that you are!
What are YOUR top dos and don’ts?
Now that you’ve seen my list, what are YOUR top dos and don’ts? Please share in the comments below!
P.S. If you liked this article, you will love my FREE Male to Female Transformation Mini Course.
I agree with Elaine. Great tips.
1. Smile and be happy. I am always happy when I get to dress! I see these great passable ladies on YouTube walking around looking mad. Enjoy being out and being dressed. Don’t be afraid to be happy.
2. Dress your Age and don’t go over the top. (Lucille has said this numerous times). Especially if you are going out and want to pass. 5 inch heels and mini skirts are fun…..but only if you can pull it off.
Love this site! Have fun dressing ladies!
Barbara, you look fantastic!! Beautiful smiling face and pretty outfit. And your two points are so insightful and valuable. Smiling and being happy has such a great impact on those we are with…and an even bigger effect on how we feel about ourselves internally. And yes, being aware of age appropriate outfits keeps us looking our most natural. Appreciate your comments
Hi Barbara! You look great, very passable! Your point about dressing age appropriate is very important I think. I’ve seen some older CD’s wearing mini skirts, halter tops and huge heels in public! It’s embarrassing! I’m 73 and try to dress my age, but being rather small I also still try to project a very feminine appearance. Here I am the other day doing what I like best, shopping! What do you think? Suzy
Thanks for the kind encouragement. What I think is I am jealous. Your project a very feminine look. An how wonderful that you go out shopping with a smile. Like I said: Enjoy dressing and go out!
All the best
Sadly, I do compare myself to other women, especially when it comes to clothing.
When using terms of endearment sweetie honey, hun and any of the others it sounds disingenuine. Just hearing that makes me suspicious that is not a genetic woman you really rarely here a genetic woman talk like that.
Don’t buy a cheap Halloween wig, a good and learn how to care for it this is an investment that will pay off time and time again. A lot of the girls that I see there’s a there is no place for a part in the hair it is a big glob in the front your hair is something that women will spend a fortune on for cutting styling coloring keratin don’t waste money on cheap wigs.
Find a good makeup artist in your area who can give you much better tips than what you will get on YouTube 2 places to look if you don’t know one or don’t have a referral are MAC, and Sephora who has recently become extremely trans-friendly. I have in my support groups seen so many girls who believed they are passable when they’re truly laughable. Don’t be one of those girls who thinks their makeup is okay. You come learn how to correct a crooked nose sunken eyes hooded eyes correct rosacea or sun spots, it is much cheaper than doing an expensive face feminisation. When in doubt ask a friend if they give you a true and honest opinion they’re your friend if they’re telling you something just to make you feel good will you know.
I get a lot of help from my wife who helps me dress and measures out my dose of estrogen. The progress goes on as I grow my breasts and I have so many other bodily changes. My clothing does not reveal my feminine side, with jeans and loose fitting tops. Almost all my underwear is now fem and the fit is good.The big bugbear is my hair, as I am bald, and I would love it if you could have an article on choices of wigs and other hairpieces. With the bodily changes, you have said nothing about the shrinkage between the legs, which at first is unexpected but we get over it and realise that women have space there.Helps to conceal. With hair dealt with,I can get on with cosmetics, etc. and dresses, and other adornments. Figure improving steadily, gently.
Which type of waist trainer is better, a corset or a neoprene stretch type? I am older with “north of 40” waistline. I intend to wear the garment at least 8 hrs/day. Any suggestions?
Preferably something that “breaths.” Don’t put too much pressure on your kidneys either. It’s tempting to squeeze that hour glass but you don’t want to damage internal organs. And always remember to eat wisely. Thin is feminine. Extra calories always go “South.” Get lots of aerobic exercise. STRETCH a lot, keep your muscles long and girly. Being flexible (physically and mentally) is always good.
What drives me crazy is in pics many Gurls forget to do several things.
1.)Smile! Big smile should always be there.
2.) Don’t stand with feet planted like a man ….always pose slightly turned with with your feet heel to mid-back foot ….look at how women stand.
3.) Don’t hang your arms and hands down your sides …place them higher up your sides with hands closed and pointed…..again see how real women pose.
do these simple things to improve you pictures 100%
Hi Elaine! I totally agree with you. Here I am the other day at Macy’s! What do you think of for this 73 year old? I always do to look as feminine as I can. My boyfriend loved me in this dress!
Love the look of that dress on you!!!
I agree with the do’s and dont’s, and I think we’ve all made those mistakes or are still making them.
That said, I feel the most important thing is to be comfortable within yourself. If you are positive and confident about yourself as a trans person you will feel great, and if you feel ashamed, guilty or embarassed by yourself, it will get you down – no matter how much like a cis female you look.
The truth is that some of us make stunning females that look like size 8 supermodels and some of just never will – no matter what we wear or do to our hair. But the good news is that cis women are all different too. Many of them are over 6ft tall, many of them are over size 20, and many of them have a deep voice. And many of those women are sexy, feminine, and confident!
Hi Sophie, what a wonderful comment! Feeling comfortable within oneself (yes, including being positive and confident) is really the foundation of feeling magnificent. And I love your wise comment on the wide variety within trans people that is parallel to the same variance of cis women. Thanks for your insight!
Hi Bobbie, thank you for your kind and thoughtful comments.
While I appreciate the many positive responses I’ve read on this site, the norm is less acceptable in settlings in my area. That does not change desires that are deep in my soul. They are there. Recently, there have been opportunities to purchase dresses that are beautiful and comfortable. I have so enjoyed these in my solitude and would like to socialize with feminisms but am reserved to home. You’re site is an opening to a potential world I hope some day I may visit.
i find not to slouch around other’s choose words when speaking with certain people maintain dress codes do your best stay clean n groomed use good or light scented colenge or purfume try match clothes don’t copy others way they dress use own while staying up with styles